Spongebob is King

2007-04-25T08:17:00.000-07:00

thank you so much ailin che che for putting the password in place. i cant afford any more of my privacy to be invaded by They Who Conceived Me. sorry for the inconvenience!

i dont think i could ever trust them again.

i couldnt help it, i purged again tonight. i ate tahu telor too fast and felt so full. i should migrate to a nice european town. i feel so fat in singapore.

oh i havent replied Dearie! haha. nah, i bet he had to turn his phone off already. and NO, he's not a bf, so save that cheeky grin. he's a dear friend :)

2007-04-24T08:24:00.000-07:00

I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU.

YOU THINK IM CAUSING YOU PAIN BUT YOU DONT FUCKING KNOW WHAT PAIN IS. YOU THINK IM SELF CENTRED BUT IF YOU WERENT SELF CENTRED YOU WOULDNT KEEP HARPING ON THE PAIN YOU AND ONLY YOU FEEL. YOU GUYS THINK YOU BLOODY KNOW EVERYTHING. YOU DONT FUCKING UNDERSTAND ME. I HATE THE TWO OF YOU. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? MID LIFE CRISIS GONE OVERBOARD? HORMONAL IMBALANCE BRINGING ABOUT EXTREME SENSITIVITY? SURE, GANG UP ON THE ONLY OFFSPRING YOU PRODUCED. THANK YOU MINGFEN FOR INVITING ME TO LUNCH TOMORROW. YOU DONT KNOW HOW GRATEFUL I AM.

YOU'RE ALWAYS SAYING I EAT TOO LITTLE. SO HOW MUCH IS ENOUGH? ENOUGH TO MAKE ME AS FAT AS BEFORE? ONLY THEN WILL YOU BE SATISFIED RIGHT? AND IT DOESNT MATTER HOW I FEEL. I MEAN, OH PLEASE, MY FEELINGS DONT CARRY HALF AS MUCH IMPORTANCE AS YOURS DO! AS LONG AS YOU'RE SATISFIED WITH HOW I LOOK, WHAT DO YOU CARE ABOUT HOW I FEEL? I WASNT BLESSED WITH THE GENES TO EAT ANY DAMNED THING AND NOT GAIN A POUND, SO FORGIVE ME, OH MIGHTY ONES, IF I SHOULD OFFEND YOU BY WATCHING WHAT I EAT. FORGIVE ME IF I DONT WISH TO LOOK LIKE AN ELEPHANT. FORGIVE ME FOR WANTING TO BE THIN.

I DONT BLAME YOU FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING, BUT DO YOU HAVE TO KEEP BRINGING IT UP? I'M VERY MUCH FATTER THAN LAST YEAR, ADMIT IT. IM SO FUCKING FAT I DONT DARE WEAR ANYTHING OTHER THAN TOPS WITH SLEEVES LONG ENOUGH TO HIDE MY UGLY FAT ARMS. AT LEAST I EAT NOW. OKAY? YOU GOT YOUR WISH. I GAINED WEIGHT. NOW YOU DONT HAVE TO BE EMBARRASSED ABOUT BEING SEEN WITH ME IN PUBLIC RIGHT. WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?????????

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE KILL ME TOMORROW? I OFFER AN ATTRACTIVE REMUNERATION PACKAGE.

I REALLY HATE YOU.

2007-04-24T07:22:00.000-07:00

my feet are eaten with noodles! my eggs are scrambled, poached and fried! my fat is used to soak rice in! IM SUCH A CHICKEN!!!!!!!!! i went out today, despite the rain, intending to go for an interview at taka and when i actually got near tower A of ngee ann city, i turned back! how stupid is that? i decided, nahhh i dont want to work in taka. and before i stepped out of the house, i was all, i hope i get the taka job! ugh. why did i have to be born with the heart of a chicken? anyway, we went to parkway parade at night and i sorta applied for the andersen's ice cream job. haha. but i dont know how to make the stuff! what if my colleagues dont like me! what if make an embarrassing mistake! now you see why i've been unemployed for so long?

gonna meet pao and sushi lian at clarke quay tml! haha.

2007-04-23T08:34:00.000-07:00

haha i got a msg from CY today! well that certainly was a nice little surprise :) i havent chatted with him in ages cuz i lost his number and besides, i thought he would have been sick of talking to me. haha.

my nails are getting annoyingly and bothersome-ly long. i dont know HOW mingfen can stand those long clickers of hers. its a gift bestowed upon her, i suppose. haha. i hate the clickety click and the clackety clack of nails hitting against surfaces. i find it incredibly irritating.

i meant to go to taka for an interview today, but the heavens decided to cry and rain down upon my plans (literally), and im not one who enjoys carrying brollys, so i stayed at home instead. i really really really want to go to the gym with daddy tml, but i dunno if they'll find out im not a member and have been gaining prohibited access to the gym's (limited) facilities. haha. i COULD go to yishun gym, but then ill be running alone and god knows how deep into the depths of loneliness one can fall by doing so.

thats me and the folks at sovereign hill. haha.

2007-04-22T07:17:00.000-07:00

i went to the gym with daddy today! all he does are weights and leg exercises, no cardio at all. and all i did was run. haha. some of his friends were there, and they're really nice uncles =D the treadmill is in a corner, facing the mirror! so i had to contend with facing my reflection while running. i suppose they mean it to act as a form of motivation. like, oh god, look at all my jiggly bits jiggling when i run. i must run more! the guy before me was totally HOGGING the machine! and he chose this program thingy where it gets harder gradually. no wonder the thing was speeding up!! luckily i reached for the stop button just before i got flung off violently. haha.

i made a smoothie today! an apple smoothie, because we bought too many and they were begging to be eaten. here's what u need for a smoothie:

1 cup fruit
1 cup milk/yoghurt
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 tablespoon honey or artificial sweetener
water or ice cubes

just chuck everything into a blender and voila, out pops a smoothie.

my equal sweetener is gone! at first i thought my dad took it, so i stormed into the room where he was napping and asked him. he said he didnt, so i stormed back into the kitchen and was forced to use *shudder* full cream milk powder. oh god think of all the fat. and then after dinner my mom said she threw the bottle away (which cost 9 bloody bucks) after discovering that the stuff had turned brown. how could she! and here i was suspecting everyone else. haha. i mean, the least she could have done was TELL me that she threw the precious sweetener away. she's a sly one, i tell you.

i made a new friend! his name is jeremy and he was from AJ too! i dont know how he got my email, but who cares? haha. he's a really nice dude too =)

2007-04-20T07:27:00.000-07:00

WELL. today turned out to be just a tenth short of being a blast :) i absolutely LOVE the treadmill. its just one of those things that should belong in the '10 greatest inventions of the century' lists, you know? this guy beside me was a total maniac. i honestly think he was pretending to be running from a pack of wolves. like, whoa nelly! watch that man go! it reminds me of the time in primary 1 or 2 where tat chung, my 'table partner', did an impression of a running man statue. haha. that was pretty stupid. but funny, nevertheless =p anyway, 20 mins per machine is the max for me, owing to my pathetic lack of self discipline. ( i need minyi to motivate me, imagine that)

and can you believe it?! yeah, neither can i! debbie actually drove to the gym! and she also drove us to her house so that she could get changed and we could go to AMK hub. (yes, AGAIN, for the third time this week! =p) it was really fun in the car. haha. i dont think i have life insurance though.

and when we got to her house, i discovered something new! that dogs do the M thing too! hers was a male dog, Pan. and it first tried to do it against minnie's leg but subsequently found ME to be a better alternative!!!! you do know what the M thing is right? hint: Male dog doing the M thing. anyway, it kept coming onto me!!!!!!!! and i kept sorta like pushing it down. A MALE DOG LIKES ME!!!!! DOES THIS MEAN IM A BITCH?!!!!! it kept licking my leg. im like, go Do It on someone your own species!!!

ah mei kaya toast serves humongous portions of coffee/tea/milo! debbie had to rush off to clarke quay for her interview. and she DID look all set to impress. haha. i ate a durian pancake for lunch. and then ham ji lian a.k.a alien lian a.k.a. minyi and i went shopping for a prezzie for her friend who's leaving for taiwan tml.

hooray i bought a table clock! its red and has these itty bitty black legs. haha. it shall be responsible for waking me tml for the AJ funfair =p so far the only people i know are going are alex winnie (thats how his name appears in my phone too), joan, huey eng and their friend. and then in the afternoon, ill be having a mahjong session with the Lians! haha.

the tv beckons, so i shall heed its call.

2007-04-20T07:17:00.000-07:00

take THAT blogger homepage! how DARE you try to prevent me from signing in to the lians homepage! I AM A LIAN! I AM ENTITLED TO BLOG HERE! liu lian lian 1, blogger.com NIL =Dprison break is on now! but its lets-brainwash-the-gullible-public-with-commercials time now, and thats why im here! also because mingfen, dear ol' sushi lian, stormed into my room, thrust her plastic sword precariously close to my bosom, held me at watergun-point and DEMANDED that this i grace this blog with my most highly sought-after presence. ha. nahhhhhhh, mingfen is the greatest, loveliest, prettiest, smartest lian in the world. *grin*

i hate going out! i saw this f***ing skinny girl at NTUC fairprice that day and im like, screw lady luck man! how come she gets to be so bloody skinny?! its not fair!!!!!!!! i think if she turned sideways, you couldnt even see her at all. and she can probably eat whatever she wants damnit! i bet she can stuff a whole elephant into her toothpick body, digest everything and STILL end up looking like half the width of a bloody chopstick. life is SO unfair. oh buts maddening is that i used to be as skinny as her. and now im NOT. sorry for this outburst of blatant superficiality.

i went to the library today and borrowed this book, '1003 great things about being a woman'. i mean, AS IF we need a book to tell us that. haha. here a few:

>All that time saved by not having to shave your face.

>Want to get out of gym class? Pretend you have your period.

>Hot flashes are useful in the winter.

>Where would the diet industry be without us?

>No prostate problems!

haha. well the last one is stupid no doubt, because then men would say "No cervix/breast problems!" but oh well, Always Look on the Bright Side of Life, huh?

debbie asked if i wanted to go to the gym with her and minnie mouse a.k.a ham ji lian tml. im like, GOD yes. take me take me! i want to run till all the glycogen in my body has been utilised and subsequently, all the fat! there's nothing quite as satisfying as finishing a cardio workout. well, except finding out that they have A&W DIET (northpoint only, bloody hell!) and vanilla coke DIET(australia only, bloody hell!) good good! im going to the yishun gym tml. too bad the other Lians cant join us because they're out WORKING AND EARNING MONEY!!

ay, gotta hit the sack now. toodles :)

2007-04-17T22:38:00.000-07:00

this little piggy is back from melbourne! has been back for 3 days in fact, but due to the intolerably scorching bloody sunny damned weather, has not had the mood to sit down patiently and blog like a good little piggy should.

i absolutely adore the weather there! it gets so cold in the morning and night, my uncle has to have heated mattresses. and the warmth of the sun can actually be pretty enjoyable! not like HERE where i had to have 5 baths yesterday. im sorry if PUB suddenly announces a water ration.

i just totally love my uncle, aunt and cousins! they're just about the greatest most hospitable family on the planet. i wasnt very close to my cousins, but it was so easy to talk to them and get along with em cuz they're brilliantly friendly, which made the trip a total knockout :)

here is a picture of me and the cuzzies! (and my mom in the background :p) thats clem, me, raphael and josh. arent we just adorable?

we were in the tram on the way to the train station. the tram travels at a lightning speed of somewhere around 20km/h. it would have come last in a snail race. haha. they brought us around the city, cuz uncle henry and aunt june were at work. i can bet my life savings (which dont amount to much) they were bored shopping with us!! i mean, they LIVE there whereas im new to all the sights and sounds. haha.

they're just so cute and their accents sometimes make it hard for me to understand them. and like a fool, i would go, 'huh? huh?' haha. see that bag on the seat behind raphie? THAT CONTAINS YOUR PRESENT, AILIN CHE CHE! =p of which its contents will be made known to you after tonight.

oh god i just remembered my weirdo dream last night. i dreamt that i could only get a role in some play if i could master the art of evil laughter. huilin you were in it too! dare i bring this up to a dream analyst?

i went out with the lians yesterday! ham ji lian wasnt there though, she had to go ruin some poor kid's future by giving him tuition. haha..plus she's bringing in massive dough with it! what, 12 an hour??! come ON!! =p

we went to pepper lunch at AMK hub. one waiter was really nice. he was so polite and smiley. but another one told me to move my bag with a 'miss, dont mind your bag'. what nonsense. of course i dont MIND my bag. if i did, i wouldnt have bought it in the first place. Loser. by the way, im liu lian lian. haha.

well im off now to serangoon central to get some milk. chocolate, banana or strawberry? the red bean soya milk we bought yesterday is SO unsatisfying. strawberry it is!

2007-04-04T21:12:00.000-07:00

im going to melbourne today! 4 of the most beautiful people on earth have sent me their farewell wishes. thank you ailin, huilin, joany and jun kiat! haha. byebye!

2007-04-03T09:33:00.000-07:00

SCREW YOU, HAIRCLIPS! stupid lousy material hairpins which rust so easily! how the heck am i supposed to put rusty hairpins in my hair without fearing an infection of SOME sort? whatever. out with the old, in with the new. haha.

well i met mr chua's brother today and he handed me The Bag =p i must say, it was a pretty amusing meeting. we were conversing, no doubt, but in different languages. haha. he spoke to me in chinese and i answered in english. i wonder if he had noticed it too.

aaaanyway. i watched 300 with the Lian Gang last night. haha. its a swell swell awesome awesome good good cool cool show. in fact, its one of the few worth-paying-good-money-for shows i have ever watched. seriously! maybe im just a sucker for ancient battle scenes. and the music makes it even more dramatic and magnificent. it makes going to war actually look cool. haha. if there's a lesson to be learnt, its that too much pride can kill. the king's annoyingly curly beard growing from his chin was just too...curly not to pay attention to. i swear, half the time i was staring at it, tempted to snip the damn thing off. haha.

JK was so nice to wish me a smooth trip to aus :) he says its tiring being in the navy. aye aye captain! haha. i wonder if he'll get to read this.

Happy belated birthday zhiliang! i sent him a msg yesterday (a first =p) i bet he thought i would forget or something. well i DIDNT!

my mom bought new, trendy, hip shoes. NOT. they are what you might call Aunty Footwear. i suppose its not her fault shes drawn to anything that screams "buy me! i guarantee to enhance your auntyness!" and she stubbornly claims she isnt one. haha. but who am i to judge? i dont give a shit about fashion anymore.

ah crap. The Parents wanted to eat macD tonight and so i, The Child, had to go along, albeit grudgingly. i actually ordered a chicken foldover, but who knew the damned thing would be big enough to feed a small african village, so i exchanged it with mom's filet-o-fish. and then i timidly ate several fries. what a harrowing experience tonight's dinner was. why cant everything be boiled or steamed or grilled? then no oil need be used. damn you, macD.

2007-03-30T06:15:00.000-07:00

here's a pic of me on my first day of nursery school! ailin and my aunt came to see me off. im the little cutesie on the extreme right, f.y.i. haha.

today is officially, as declared by me, day 1 of The Diet. i hope my current steely determination does not waver and fade.

stupid mom. she says she doesnt want to go to work because she's 'worried' about me. she's afraid ill go skip my lunches again. welllll i cant say for certain that i wont, but at this rate it doesnt matter ANYWAY because she's not going to work ANYWAY. crap.

eveyrtime i lie in bed, i think about what i can blog about the next day. it just comes naturally. haha. the curse of being an insomniac. and then i come up with snakingly long mental lists of all the stuff i wanted to blog about, but then stupidly enough, my very reliable and very trustworthy brain (not) manages to shove these thoughts to some forgotten crevice in the back of my uh, cerebrum by the time morning rolls around and i am clear-headed enough to remember my pre-sleep thoughts.

my friend, she-who-shall-not-and-need-not-be-named-for-obvious-reasons, told me in an sms that she felt moody and angry upon waking, for no apparent reason. and i told her thats EXACTLY how i felt only a few weeks ago! i wasnt talking to anyone in my family, i would go out with a face blacker than snow white's hair and would be silent the whole journey. i would look into every mirror and scowl in unconcealed disgust at the blob of blubber scowling back. i hated (still do) my reflection, my life and everyone in it, even though technically that would be unfair. and then suddenly one day i just...stopped feeling so terrible. i didnt get HAPPIER or anything, just not so forlorn and expressionless. maybe it was cuz the anti-depressants ran out. so i told her that it was probably a phase she would soon be free from. i believe that she's able to do that on her own, without the help of chemicals. unlike me, unfortunately.

2007-03-29T05:53:00.000-07:00

i feel SO SO SO SO SO SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW. BLOOD-BOILINGLY FURIOUS. EAR-STEAMINGLY ENRAGED. FIST-SHAKINGLY FEROCIOUS WITH MADDENING FURY. because for the whole of today, and its already 9pm, I HAVE NOT CUT SO MUCH AS A SINGLE BUSINESS DEAL. i.e. constipation. no, it most certainly is not a pleasant feeling. and that is why right now, 3 hours after dinner, i still feel bloated and fucking fat. actually, i always feel fucking fat, but TODAY i feel ESPECIALLY fat because of my temporary inability to defacate.

im sorry if this grosses you out, but guess what? IT'S MY BLOG, SO I DONT GIVE A DAMN. my tummy feels really uncomfortable. i feel like punching the daylights out of it! or connecting it to the vacuum cleaner and sucking the hell out of it. oh god it feels so big and round. is this the start of a beer belly?! its full of fat. i need to lose weight. i need to lose weight. i need to lose weight.

last night was really cool. i went out with my cousin ailin :) we wanted to watch a movie but who knew all the shows at cathay and PS would suck, so we ate ya kun (no, not the man himself) and walked and talked. and dammit, we realised that cineleisure was showing freedom writers! the only show worth watching at the moment, in my opinion. what a waste. i was looking forward to eating sweet popcorn. but oh, to hell with popcorn! talking and shopping with ailin che che was way more enjoyable. the sad part was that my glorious brain forgot to bring the camera. otherwise we could have taken pictures, which would then be uploaded on this blog, which would then not look so wordy and uninviting.

weird dream number 2 happened last night. before going to bed, i was watching the "one more chance" dvd, the singapore movie directed by jack neo, starring the 3 usual suspects. 'san ge hao ren' in chinese. its about how they met in prison and what happened in their lives when they were released. anyway, i dreamt that i was playing cards with them! haha. because in the show, marcus chin played the chronic gambler. darn, i dont think the dream lasted long enough for me to win any money.

oh fish, mom drank my opened can of diet coke again!!! i deliberately opened the can and left it in the fridge to let the gas escape, because i swear upon my life, i DETEST carbobated drinks. i only like diet coke because its calorie-less yet not tasteless like water. NOW I GOTTA OPEN ANOTHER CAN AND WAIT FOR IT TO DE-GAS. i must buy post-it pads soon.

my clumsy fingers have so clumsily scratched my grotesque zit by mistake, which now is stinging from the pain. well SERVES YOU BLOODY RIGHT, YOU HORRID LITTLE (not literally) PIMPLE! NOW you'll know better than to grow on my forehead without my permission (as if you need ask).

as one can plainly infer, tonight i am a bitter, bitter girl.

2007-03-27T22:24:00.000-07:00

great! the fridge has relented and decided to make ice again.

anyway. i have these stupidly bizarre dreams every night. like last night, i dreamt that my friend, XXXXXX had a twin brother and that he was my bf. haha. it wasnt a particularly nightmarish dream, not like the kind you wake up in a cold sweat panting or whatever. in fact, it was like chinese drama. somehow my parents found out and my mother was holding up this huge piece of cardboard intending to whack his brains out. and then i grabbed the cardboard and hit her! haha. it was really sweet. i remember liking him a lot. but why did it have to be XXXXXX's twin brother?! it isnt as if i know XXXXXX very well or anything. they didnt look anything like each other though. which was a relief. otherwise i dont think i would dare sleep again.

there was this time i woke up with tears in my eyes. now THAT was scary. it wasnt a scared-the-shit-out-of-me kind of dream. more like a you-hurt-me-more-than-anyone-could kind.

2007-03-26T07:07:00.000-07:00

yayyy i found Law and Order at the esplanade library today! the FOURTEENTH season too. too bad it wasnt Law and Order special victims unit, my favourite series! even though its mostly about rape cases. haha. mom has a dinner with her pri school classmates, cuz uncle simon has to go back to LA. so you know, they had a kinda farewell dinner for him. they're always having dinners! anyway, im sick of going to dinners where everyone stuffs their faces so i went with dad to the esplanade lib to borrow dvds.

yes yes! got crime shows to watch this week. heheh. my mom is a sucker for crime shows too, so i msged her that i found law and order. we've watched most of the crime shows you can borrow at the library. haha.

anyway, she is SO darn petty. she takes offence to the slightest hint of rudeness coming from me! she's so bloody sensitive, worse than a mercury thermometer. i know why. she's JEALOUS. that my dad gets to have my company and she doesnt. haha. i talk better with my dad, i dont know why. maybe she's feeling neglected and unloved by me. haha.

oh kerrrap the fridge seems to be rebelling against us. i topped up the ice tray with water this afternoon and now, 6 whole hours later, the water hasnt frozen yet. something is very wrong. first thing tomorrow im taking it to the doctor's!

2007-03-23T06:34:00.000-07:00

i feel shitty for 2 reasons.

1. i got a bloody headache now because i just HAD to read on the bus. dammit. it was the driver's fault. he shoulda stopped me.

2. i dont feel like going to australia. holidays should be taken once in a blue moon. that way, they wont lose their appeal. i just went to genting in..well, february and im going to aus in april. plus, i wish we were going with my favourite cousin and her family. she so very kindly helped me with my change of blogskin :D its not my fault i was born a suaku..OR IS IT???

god. if axe brand oil doesnt come into contact with my temples in 10 seconds, i swear ill puke. there isnt anything good on the telly tonight! supernatural sucks. tuesday's shows are totally hot. all that crime solving, ass kicking, men-in-police-uniform detetctive shows are my favourite! haha. i borrowed a sherlock holmes dvd from esplanade library. im a sucker for whodunits, arent you?

today was pretty cool. me and mummy dearest met up with aunty suzannah, her primary school chum, for lunch at new york new york at AMK hub. that place is a little antarctica on its own. and after lunch they just sat and talked and talked, like they always do when they meet. what can i say? AUNTYYYY. anyway, as they sat on their asses and yakked, i went for a little walkabout on my own. i went around the whole place TWICE, huge as it is. cuz they never called! when i went back to check that they hadnt vacated the premises and chucked me behind, surprise surprise, they were still yakking their hearts away. haha.

OH WOW! i feel better already. sad to say, its not due to axe brand, but gwei hua balm. haha. its the new love of my life! not that i had one for it to replace.

i wonder if that was zhiliang and his gf i saw today!! heehee. WAS IT, ZL? i doubt anyone reads my blog anymore :(

2007-03-20T00:24:00.000-07:00

are these not cool toys? haha. toys r us is just so the place for me and people like me, people who dont grow up. oh oh and have u seen those little japanese mini food display item thingamajigs? they're utterly adorable! and u can buy display cabinets to put em in too. why oh why cant my parents strike lottery?

2007-03-19T23:40:00.000-07:00

12.15pm: wakes up and is hit by the pungent stench of reality, afterwhich pops into the shower and then watches martha stewart (just gotta love the woman!)

1pm: has lunch reluctantly and feels decidedly full afterwards even though doesnt have unusually more (wonders if stomach may be shrinking)

1-2: watches sesame street and franny's feet

2(now): sits at the computer and considers course options fearfully and fickle mindedly as perspiration trickles down sides of face to accumulate in salty puddles on floor

what if i make a mistake? what i cant cope with the courseload? what if i cant make friends? what if it turns out to be nothing like i expected? THEN what do i do? but i cant very well wait till 11:59:59 on 31 march to decide. its all so scary, the thought of going to uni (if i can get in), the thought of having to forge new relationships with new faces all over again. familiarity is a comfortable feeling. it isnt that i dont like making new friends, because hell, i do, but its just..you know, worrying. and what if my miniscule brain cant handle the work???

im not really keen on science, but im sorta interested in food sci and tech. i want to be a nutritionist, or a dietician. but its so sciency and im not a science freak myself. business sounds interesting, but we've all heard stories about how the people there can be like. correct me if im wrong, and my apologies should i have offended anyone.

you know what i really want to do? mass comm, thats what. ive always longed to be a newsreader. haha. but dammit NUS doesnt have that and i dont want to go to NTU. just didnt have the FEW-LING. oh bloody hell they're both so far anyway.

2007-03-16T21:31:00.000-07:00

im staying over at my cousin's house today! havent done this in SUCH a long time. well anyway, THIS is what real people in the real world look like in the morning before they've had breakfast, bathed or done anything except pry their sleepy eyes open. haha.

i'll blog more about my adventures in chai chee when i get back later. haha.

2007-03-15T05:47:00.000-07:00

today's mood: 6.2 on the Depressed Scale, 10 being suicidal

Good God, the giant at tampines is humongous. rows and rows and aisles and aisles of you-name-its. i wanted to buy the sugar free jam but the damned queues were snaking around the whole store, so what the heck. sugar free jam shall bloody hell have to wait.

my mom wanted to buy more satay broad beans and assorted nuts. im like, DONT YOU DARE PUT THAT GARBAGE IN THE CART, MOTHER! HANDS OFF THE BAGS OF NUTS OR ELSE. because like a mother-of-all-pigs, ive been stuffing my damned face with nuts these past few days. the house could do with fewer sinful temptations. she bought fish crackers yesterday!!! the nerve.

anyway. im following my dad to sernagoon central to withdraw some sweet smelling $$$$$ and buy some bread. going for a walk to burn calories. burn, baby, burn!

2007-03-14T06:09:00.000-07:00

my aunt and cousin gave me a digital camera! yayyyy. they're so cool. they're totally number 1 on my Favourite Relatives list. plus they gave me a chocolate cake too, which i have eating every night in case before it goes bad. haha. im not so depressed these days. on a scale of 1 to 10, im proud to say i have progressed from a pathetic 8.5 to an impressive 6.5. 2 whole notches! what gives? haha.

my mom just threw up cuz she felt giddy after coming out of NTUC fairprice Xtra. for about a nano fraction of a second, i felt a pang of jealousy. like, hey no fair, she gets to throw up and i dont. but that feeling has thankfully evanesced. i feel like the worst daughter on the planet. i dont think i show my parents my love, like i rightfully should. i read this email yesterday about how you should cherish the people you love while they're still around and all that, and i guess it sorta hit a nerve. from today, i shall proclaim my love to all my friends and family!!!

oh, and by the way, i STILL dont know what course i should fricking apply for. and *snorts* will they even WANT me???? i mean, face it, only about a goddamned TON of people have straight As in their pockets. what are MY grades compared to theirs?!

i've taken a liking to pureed fruit. i've been meaning to buy the baby food kind, but those arent exactly dirt cheap, considering they cost about 2 bucks a bottle. GOD what is WRONG with babies? how dare they eat such expensive food? you know, satay broad beans are incredibly nice too.

i wish i could study medicine, then i could become a plastic surgeon and lipo myself. ha bloody ha.

2007-03-10T20:23:00.000-08:00

i really love my friends. they are the most awesome people. we went to sentosa on friday. and i know, i looked so down and unhappy for most of the trip and smiled only when they said something to me, so i hope they dont hate me for that. they gave me an elmo balloon which i carried proudly around =) its in my room now, by my bed. the helium is still intact. huilin said i could have it repumped for $2. haha. and then we ate at Hong Kong Kim Gary restaurant at vivocity. what good foresight we have! the food was fantastic. i think we all went bonkers over the amount of cheese available. heheh. you just gotta love cheeeese. i really love them for not blaming me for showing a black face if i did. plus they made a scrapbook for me! that is so cool. i nearly teared reading it. well its my birthday today. i dont feel particularly happy, but not particularly upset either. to my most pleasant surprise, i got 11 msgs from the angels who actually remembered =D maybe, on your birthday, life isnt so bad after all. hee. thank you once again for the beautiful gems who remembered my bday and cheering me up a notch =) we're going to meet my aunt and cousin now to have lunch. i wonder what mom and dad have for me. but really, presents and all dont matter anymore.

2007-03-08T05:18:00.000-08:00

i know the PERFECT word that describes me. NUMB. and i know the perfect anthem which suits my life to a T. "NUMB". i had to follow mom to meet my granduncle, that is, her uncle at the stupid high tea coffee house shit thing at goodwood park hotel. where i ate some cakes. yes CAKES. from the DESSERT section. i mean so what if they were tiny little pieces? the fact is, I STILL ATE THEM. i HATE MYSELF. i hate that she had to pick some stupid high tea buffet place to meet granduncle. why couldnt she have suggested some ala carte place for gods sake? but the biggest culprit in the picture is of course myself. WHY DID I HAVE TO EAT FROM THE DESSERT SECTION??? WHY??????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not that they had salad or anything. i was bent on eating that before entering. bloody shit i have committed a sin.

anyway. i can hear my mother crying on the phone. probably complaining to someone about her damn failure of a daughter. LOOK IM SORRY MOTHER. IM SORRY THAT I HATE MY LIFE AND MYSELF SO MUCH THAT ITS HURTING YOU TOO. IM SORRY I CANT BE THE PERSON THAT I WAS IN THE PAST. OKAY?????????????? im sorry, everyone. when will all this end? only when my life is over????

2007-03-06T04:34:00.000-08:00

so my mom asked me what i wanted for my birthday. honestly, mother? now, you probably won't be able to afford it, but i want a full body liposuction gift voucher. yup, ill have every bit of fat lipo-ed from my bod. from my ballooning ass, middle, arms and ugly legs. i made this incredible fashion faux pas today wearing SHORTS. and thereby showing off my fat ugly legs. i stopped in front of every reflective surface to snarl and glare at my ugly reflection. my butt is definitely getting fatter. im not kidding. god i SO want a lipo. birthday present, okay? sharon asked if i wanted to go to the beach on friday or something. are you kidding me? me in beach gear? yes, the world is SO ready for that. all the fat jiggling in shorts and a tank. how can i possibly torment people like that? they might not recover from the trauma. i need to find a job. im going nuts slacking everyday, going out and seeing other people skinnier than me. I AM SUCH A PATHETIC LOSER.

2007-03-05T06:14:00.000-08:00

oh god. when was the last time i actually felt happy? or even laughed? i am just so depressed these days. depressed and glum and introverted and reclusive and reserved. i dont talk much to my parents. when i go out, its them who do the talking while i just tag along silently. i dont feel like talking anymore. i used to like life! i used to like living. i dont anymore. f.y.i, this isnt entirely due to my stupid alevel grades. i wake up every morning feeling fat. i swear upon my life (not that i value it) that my ass is increasing in size. its getting fatter. i hate standing in front of the mirror because i hate the person staring (sulking, actually) back at me. how can i have gone from being cheery and sunshiney to the current pile-of-nothingness-from-grumpsville that i am right now in a matter of one year? i hate wearing sleeveless shirts because i hate seeing my fatass arms. same goes for shorts. i should just go out in a potato sack. and everytime i sit down, theres this ring of blubber around my stupid middle which i absolutely detest.

2007-03-02T05:33:00.000-08:00

i feel like shit today. my results are like SHIT. 2 A 2B and B3. OKAY??? you can all gloat now. ive been crying the whole day. im getting stupider everyday.

2007-03-01T05:23:00.000-08:00

Girl, soon to be 19, dies of excruciating sole ache caused by tottering about in heels for 9 hours. The tragedy which shocked the nation occurred just one day before the release of the GCE Alevel results.

thats right, the soles of my feet hurt like crazy! darn heels from bugis.

OH MY GOD.

today is the FIRST OF MARCH. tomorrow is the SECOND OF MARCH. in less than 24 hours, i will be holding the results slip in my trembling hands. what, oh what does fate have in store for me??? with each tick of the clock, my heart skips a beat. i cried before getting the olevel results. the atmosphere in the hall was unbearably tense. my tear glands just couldnt take the pressure. oh crap. i cant believe its TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-02-28T06:19:00.000-08:00

back from genting! they're mental, Mother's friends are. for 4 days in a row we ate at chinese restaurants for dinner. those new year set dishes with loh hay and everything. like, HELLO! is 'moderation' a new, unheard-of concept around here? anyway i didnt get to go to KL because they spent half the day sitting aruond the coffee house table talking and yakking and catching up. they've known one another since primary 1, is that cool or what? and CRAP i couldnt go to the casino. i've never been to a casino! i actually thought the minimum age was 18, which is cool, because even though my height belies my true age, the passport does not lie. but SHIT i was mistaken! its bloody 21. but thats cool too, because it makes me feel young and of inadequate age as yet.

here's something i bet few of you have noticed. when you hurl french fries, they come out looking like mashed potatoes. and if you had happened to eat those fries with chilli sauce, then it comes out resembling Bloody Mashed Potatoes. cool huh? and the after-hurl tastes okay too. some after-hurls are so unpleasant, you just want to hurl again. but nooooooo, french fries are gooooood.

i have developed an unusual habit. i can't sleep without holding a remote in my hands. at home, the hi fi remote serves another purpose. at the hotel, it was the tv remote. well, it WAS the only remote in the room. haha. there's something strangely comforting and reassuring about fingering the poppy-out buttons on the remote. it somehow aids in slumber. my darn pillow is starting to look like a small valley. either my face is getting fatter or my brain is expanding.

holy moley i think that was aaron i saw in the esplanade!! i dunno, he's a dancer, and the esplanade seems an appropriate place for a dancer to be spotted in. we were coming out from the toilet (not the same one) and after he walked past, he turned back to look at me a second time. like, he did a double take. a sort of is-that-you? kind of way. i just stared back at him. i didnt recognise him at first. but if i really had to match the face to someone i know, it would be him. haha. he looks hot now! looks like someone's been working out over the years. i havent seen him for..5 years. oh my GOD. i wonder what it would have been like to go out with him back then. blame it on my shyness. but really, you couldnt blame me. i was young and stupid at sec 2. haha. i remember he kinda freaked me out a little cuz he kept calling me and stuff. called my house too. yes, like i said, i was stupid not to give my hp number instead. he was from st andrew's. i wonder where he is now. and bloody hell i lost his contact along with my phone!! shittery shoots. and he doesnt even come online. once, he had some trouble with his girlfriend cuz he came on too fast on her and she sorta backed away and they broke up. i remember him telling me that they werent just gf and bf, but LOVERS. haha. i will never forget that line. gosh i wonder if it was really him i saw! he looks real buff now. hee.

2007-02-17T22:57:00.000-08:00

ugh. what a crappy day. everytime i look down, i start to feel dizzy. what is WRONG with me! its the first day of the new year. some guests have come. my appetite is small today. GOOD. so i wont overeat and stuff myself with rubbish cookies. good good. maybe what they say on the back of the bottle is actually true. that they suppress appetite. good good. may this keep up. i feel so fat today. i dont dare to weigh myself anymore. because if the scale even so much as touches 39 i swear im gonna blow my brains out with a..bazooka. see my pathetico life. my parents dont understand me. and i dont blame them. its not as if im dying to spill my guts and pour my heart out to them. like oh please, AS IF they're going to understand. as if ANYONE who's not going through the same ordeal is going to understand. HA HA. this is what i have turned my life into. a living hell. has anyone heard 'runaway love' by ludacris and mary j blige? --"forced to think that hell is a place called home". in my case, hell is an experience called life. sure, some of you are going to think, what is this girl doig, wallowing in self pity? there are lots more unfortunate people in this world who have no food to eat, no clothes to wear, no place to sleep. but here's a reality check. what constitutes pain is subjective.

2007-02-17T07:01:00.000-08:00

she's sick of me. i just know she is. she's sick of listening to my damned sob stories all the time, she just doesnt reply anymore. she used to send words of comfort whenever i sent distress smses to her. now she just plains ignores it and only msges me if she wants to ask me something. FINE. like im so bloody desperate for her sympathy. she probably thinks its just another one of my 'episodes'. yet another 'relapse' and that ill get over it in time to come, so like, oh why bother? waste my sms only. yeah, thats alright, go ahead, dismiss it as Just Another Phase in Life. just you wait until something happens. and im half hoping something does. i was way pissed that day. anyway i feel like a bloody fatass again. make that all the time. and whats worse, its CNY period. that means more cookies. a.k.a. tubs and tubs of evil, fatfilled pastry. that means ill become even fatter. and this blog is just going to get more depressing. and the people who are still reading this will find themselves wasting their time. have you ever got to that point in your life where you feel like its not worth living? like, oh screw the traffic light. so what if the fricking van hits me? its not as if anyone's going to mourn. nobody's life is going to be disrupted due to the loss of one. you know? like, for gods sake, i dont even like my life. i hate everything about it. i hate everything about me. im just alive because nothing's killed me yet. gosh this is so morbid. no wonder i dont find supposedly gory movies gory anymore.

2007-02-16T21:29:00.000-08:00

oh god im such a failure. i tried to get it out, honestly i did but i FAILED. i couldnt, maybe cuz there wasnt enough liquid. i succeeded yesterday, much to my delight and relief. but today's was more important because i had lots of lunch. i wanted to try a second time after drinking more water but then laziness got the better of me and then i thought oh screw it. shit. shit. shit. i ate 2 Thingamajigs at 12.05 and then mom delayed the lunch till like 12.45 so i decided to play it safe and ate 2 more at 12.40. it takes 15 mins to work, according to the back of the bottle. my blog gets more and more depressing huh? last time it was all, happy-happy-joy-joy-war-is-a-thing-of-the-past and now its like an entry out of The Vampire's Guide to Life. things have changed. this entry shouldnt even be in pink. pink is a happy colour. for the old me.

2007-02-15T06:30:00.000-08:00

I hate my life I hate my life I hate my life. I feel so bloody godammned fricking fat every single day. At my skinniest, i used to be thinner than everyone else and now its the reverse. im a fat fricking fatso with a ball for a tummy and tree trunks for arms and legs, only thicker. I feel like a damned freak every day. Im getting fatter for gods sake. I shouldnt have succumbed to the temptation of food. I should have just stuck with my regime and then I wouldnt have gained weight. but NO i just had to start having supper every night. every bloody single night and i feel so fking fat after. I used to be so skinny. and now im a bloody fatass. im not saying i dont like fat people, dont get me wrong. i just dont want the fat to be on me. i want to go back to being the skinny little not-even-there wafer-thin fatless thing i used to be. it was only one month ago. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?

2006-08-18T01:45:00.000-07:00

Joan, Vanda, Jessica. (1605)

I am more inclined towards Ridley’s view as I think that Lundberg’s view is too one-sided and pessimiistic while Ridley’s view is more balance.

It is true that as Passage 2 (paragraph 8, Line 40) mentioned that many ‘are fed such a strong diet of news about how bad things are’, such as the possibility of biological warfare with the terrorists and the increasing level of unemployment of people who do not have the high end skills that many employers in a knowledge based economy are looking for. This is why people, with their increasing fear and insecurity about the unforeseen future, shifted all the balance to technology, as was the case for Lundberg from passage 1. He keeps pouring about the doom and gloom that technology will bring, like the eventual fate of Earth turning ‘into a Venusian hell’ (passage 1, paragraph 5, Line 42). Lundberg forgets that people enhance technology as it does bring about benefits. For example, the constant research on hydrogen fuels and other alternative cleaner fuels to fossil fuels are helping to ease the problem of global warming and its effects. Thus, we should not just dispute technology as something undesirable.

As Ridley has mentioned, ‘self knowledge about the causes of our behaviour will liberate people to make choices’. Technology enables us to better understand ourselves by making information just a click or a phone call away. Science explains phenomenon that have piqued human curiosity, allowing man to search for solutions to their problems.

The holocaust during the Second World War happened a result of the Germans being too gullible and accepting of Hitler’s claims that the Germans were superior to every other race. Hitler even claimed that it was Nature which dictated the survival of the superior race and the extermination of the inferior, and this is simply bad biology. Due to the people’s ignorance, the Jews were made to suffer a most tragic fate. Thus, I believe that science and technology, with continual advancement and when applied in the appropriate ways, will benefit people more as they will then be equipped with the knowledge to clear their misconceptions, empowering them to make better, more informed decisions.

In Singapore, I think technology has improved the quality of life in general. Indeed, Singaporeans are ‘healthier, wealthier and wiser than before’. (passage 2, line 45). From a small, newly independent nation which many initially doubted would thrive, Singapore has braved the storms these 41 years to blossom into a vibrant, global city, bustling with trade and boasting impressive economic growth records today. Technology has played a tremendous part in aiding Singapore in its rapid development and improving the quality of life of many Singaporeans. It has improved the efficiency of the labour force, with the incorporation of advanced devices such as video conferencing facilities and high tech machinery. It has also enabled the building of impressive infrastructure such as a reliable telecommunications network to attract the setting up of many multinational corporations. Without technology, Singapore would not have been able to progress so quickly into a business hub teeming with life and potential. It has made the lives of many Singaporeans more convenient and through the achievement of greater economic growth, has helped to boost the average household’s income significantly. Thus, I believe that it has improved the quality of life for a great many people.

2006-08-06T09:20:00.000-07:00

Mention the term ‘computer gaming’ and in most people, what leaps to mind is the image of a young boy staring, fixated, at his computer screen, enthralled by the grotesque splattering of enemy blood under his skilful navigation. Incidents of the obsession with computer gaming have sullied the reputation which computer gaming, over its short history of thirty years, has created for itself. However, as farfetched as it may appear, I do believe that computer gaming should be considered a healthy pursuit because of the various benefits it can confer to the individual.

Playing computer games keeps the mind sharp and alert by honing one’s reflexes. It trains the mind to be more aware of its surroundings and enables the individual to respond as quickly as possible to changes in his environment. Engaging in games such as ‘warcraft’ and ‘counterstrike’ requires players to be on the alert at all times, detecting their enemies and finishing them off before they themselves are spotted first. An experiment conducted by ‘Child of our time’ showed that children exposed to computed games had faster reaction times than those who did not. This shows that computer gaming does promote the development of sharp reflexes, therefore contributing to a healthy and sharp mind.

Furthermore, many computer games today encourage teamwork among players. In various multiplayer online games, the more popular choices being ‘Maple Story’ and ‘Nukezone’, players organize themselves into teams and work together to bring about the defeat of other teams in order to emerge the proud victors. In these games, teamwork and cooperation are indispensable ingredients in the broth of ultimate success and through playing such games, players, in particular the young, are taught the importance and usefulness of copperating well with others to the progress of the entire team. A study conducted by multimedia giant ‘Electronic Arts’ revealed that after playing multiplayer games for a period of two months, right in ten children ages five to twelve were better able than before to work with other children to complete tasks, proving that individuals can pick up life skills such as teamwork through computer games.

With the spotlight increasingly being focused on creative thinking and critical problem solving skills in society today, it is comforting to know that computer gaming can also stimulate one’s mind to think out of the box and explore various methods of liberating oneself from the same dilemma. Not all computer games involve physical mutilation of opponents. Some require players to crack bewildering puzzles and baffling codes to successfully advance to the next level. Such tasks are certainly no child’s play and players are forces to put their intelligence quotas to this grueling test and source for possible solutions. Through such games, players’ minds will be trained to look at problems from different angles, promoting the development of a creative, versatile mind. One pristine example is “Archimedes’ Lab Puzzle”, where players are bombarded with a barrage of complex mathematical sums and are required to solve them in a stipulated time before progressing to the next level. Through such mind boggling computer games, players can develop a healthy, creative mind.

However, excessive computer gaming can also be addictive for those who lack discipline. With the overwhelming urge to progress to a higher level, some would neglect all other responsibilities and the opportunity costs of whiling away precious time playing computer games. In a recent article published in ‘The Straits Times’, a father, when interviewed, lamented that his teenage son became so obsessed with completing a computer game that he would lock himself in his room every day after school, bent on fuelling this unhealthy obsession, and was nonchalant about his plummeting grades.

Also, excessive exposure to computer game violence can translate into players exhibiting such forms of violence in real life. A Swedish newspaper once reported that after the game ‘Doom’ had been introduced into the country, the rate of juvenile crime had, and not by mere coincidence, witnessed a considerable increase. Such games portray violence to be an acceptable means of solving problems, requiring players to stab, punch or put a bullet through their opponents to render them innocuous to their advance to a higher level. Children and younger teenagers are especially vulnerable to this irresponsible and reprehensible depiction of violence, thus it is understandable that in this respect, computer gaming cannot be considered a healthy pursuit.

It is hard to dispel the notion that computer gaming necessarily leads to failing grades and blatant neglect for all other duties and life, as evidence has shown. However, this is only true in extreme cases. Computer gaming, the phenomenon which has captured the world by storm, is not merely about decapitating three-headed dragons or slaying humongous in a nauseating fashion. It can indeed promote a healthy mind, and thus constituting a healthy body. The danger lies only when computer gaming becomes an obsession. Like everything else in life, computer gaming will be healthy if consumed in moderation and where one finds it impossible to extricate himself from the excitement and exhilaration of the game, discipline and willpower must come into play before entertainment morphs into obsession.

2006-04-15T09:44:00.000-07:00

i had a tiff with the Mother. she like, channels all her energy into correcting my speech or something! i was saying something like, "where got like that!" and she was all, "what are you talking!" like i was speaking in some tribal tongue. anyway, of course i tried to defend myself and started talking back. i got all huffy and said "so you think my english is very bad ah? FINE, keep thinking that! you always think my grammar is very bad! (its true, she probably thinks i suck at everything) this is conversational english what, then you expect me to speak in proper english all the time MEH??"

correct me if im wrong, but its only natural to get worked up and raise your voice so much so that you appear to be disrespectful. this thus provoked a strong reaction from the Father, who then got huffier than i did earlier on, and asked rhetorically, "how can you speak so rudely to us?" should i have answered? i was PROVOKED, godammit. my mom thrives on picking out every little morsel of error in my speech and then over-amplifying the magnitude of its relevance in my life.

HEYYYY!! my friends are distracting me from completing this entry!!!!!!! its all their fault there's so little read today. haha. dicky thinks blogs are a waste of time. i think he thinks almost everything is a waste of time la! =p oh yeah, we went to the other dicky's house yesterday to prepare the stuff for family day next saturday! its fun decorating plain white mugs.

oh, not to defame a certain brand of paint markers or anything, but i think painty markers are the best!! they're tops! go out and buy a painty marker today! everyone needs a painty marker. haha. i painted hearts and stars and fishies and thick luscious lips! tee hee. dont we all love luscious lips? uh, yes, they all looked girly but perhaps it would appeal to the more effeminate males as well. haha. jessica is SUCH as artist! she was in a catty mood yesterday and drew lots of cats on lots of plates. haha.. her art is really good. she's well-deserving of the smacking big A1 she got for art in olevels =D i have to go now. toodles!

2006-04-07T09:23:00.000-07:00

MUST he call me that???? MUST HE??! it was highly embarrassing. and where on earth he first heard it, i have not the slightest inkling. only people i like can call me that! not that i despise him or anything, dont get me wrong. but he's starting to get a little annoying at times now. of course i try not to show it, because it IS rude, after all. it's tactless and insensitive and im against those nasty traits. haha. i think its callous of people to avoid him like the plague. i mean, sure, you dont like the guy, but hey, at least show some manners. that said, do you ever wonder what makes him tick to a different tune from the rest of us?

i wish i had a fully equipped gym in my room! and a personal trainer wouldnt hurt either. haha..that would be totally cool. dont you feel fat after eating? im amazed at how people can eat snacks in between meals and not feel guilty about it. maybe its just me. im thirsty!

hey! dicky's the first person i know who watches boston legal and grey's anatomy too! haha. shocking realisation. cool..ive been asking around but nobody seems to watch the shows i watch! not even chee yao! who's like this bad influence =p he's like some ardent TV supporter. haha!

my glasses has this accursed scratch on it now, a result of an accident with the rifle. haha..i was cocking the thing and it slipped on the chair and whacked the left lens of my glasses against my eye, so that there was an imprint of my eyelashes on the lens =p i was so afraid i would have a blackeye the netx day. thankfully my eye remained in its socket, still relatively attached to the uh, dunno-what muscle. shit! what muscle is it? erectus? no, thats the hair muscle. whatever. haha. i hope its not jinxed or anything, as fioni suggested, cuz.. the same thing happened to weiling!the rifle hit her head though =p why is it retaliating?! have i not been kind to it?? so i dont oil it anymore, so what! no matter. i must go and make amends with it on monday. haha. there's this irritating little blur speck on my glasses now! i tried using brasso to rub it off, it being an abrasive and all, but alas, it was to no avail. =(

im REALLY thirsty now. im drying up and my skin is flaking off by the metre.

dont you just LOATHE it when you ask people a question and then they go like, ___lah! that one word, that seemingly innocent one tiny little word changes the whole tone of the answer. it makes the answerer sound all-knowing and smart and you, inferior and stupid and a total dumbass. its just so lip-bitingly, fist-clenchingly ANNOYING. you notice i find many things annoying these days. haha.

we sent in a sample to the tshirt man, finally =D i hope it turns out nice, even though the material is kinda scratchy and hot. haha. see, people DO place more importance on looks than comfort. the supplier who supplies the soft material shirt supposedly has sucky embroidery =p and we'd much rather compromise on the scratchiness of the shirt than on the ugliness. haha.

shit! im sorry, ZL, u called when i was watching tv =p thats like, the third missed call ive had from him. haha. im uncontactable most of the time, sorry =p

i thought of being a marriage counsellor. haha. there's a certain satisfaction in seeing couples ending up happy together, or at least working things out when they're going through a rough patch. relationships need effort, for the most part, especially if you've been together for well, long enough. haha. now, im no love guru here, but its just a little observation i made. =p i feel really sad when couples break up you know? perhaps my emotional quotient is too high. like, when u hear of people dedicating songs to their exes on the radio, saying how they really miss them and whatnot, i get sad along with them. im a walking bag of empathy. haha.

sigh..my dearest didi, terence, thinks he will probably be retained cuz he skips school like, once a week. he's in ITE anyway. he says he doesnt like the place..sometimes u just really want to make people see the folly of their thoughts, but u dont know how. i want to convince him not to hate his school, just like how i want to convince people in my school not to think lowly of AJ. (some people are constantly putting it down. yes, you guessed it. it adds to the List of Things which Annoy Vanda.)

johnny let me hear the sample he's going to be playing with his band for AJ idol, and his guitar is not bad, really =) i really hope he makes it through the audtions!! so i will someone to cheer for. haha. its sad that i dont get to see johnny, hinho, yingyee and weiling during training anymore, cuz we train on different days. why dont the nasty people let us book more than 5 lanes!! =( it impedes bonding. at least i get to see weiling in class. sigh..

i feel lonely tonight. you know that song by elvis? "are you lonesome tonight?" Damn right i am.

2006-04-01T08:31:00.000-08:00

strawberry swiss roll is COOL.

hi5 is coming to singapore!! haha..well, chee yao said so! i bet he watches it religiously everyday at 530. =p

i just had dinner at 11pm! after tuition. haha. i feel totally random today. pretty much like how winnie feels everyday. he's a random little bear, that pooh. haha..oh oh joan and i were being all silly yesterday and we sent the same message to winnie during econ lecture. haha. we told him that somebody was in love with him =p it IS true, in a very 0.00001% kinda way. cuz someone wrote "i love pooh" on the back of the bus 13 seat which we took to j8 that day =p haha..it was stupid, sending the exact same message to him. but hey, thats what happens when econs lectures fail to evoke sufficient interest to render us rapt with attention. haha..actually it gets pretty interesting now, learning about trade and money and stuff =D we wanted to tell him that bobby was his secret admirer and all that, but sadly, he figured it out and said that it wasnt funny =p i hope he at least got a little curious. haha.

we didnt have any lessons yesterday! it was Innovation and Enterprise day!! it was pretty fun =p i mean, seriously, what can beat not having lessons for an ENTIRE day? =D especially when there was supposed to be practical. skill A somemore! so anyway, booths were set up all around school, sorta of like this carnival thing, only without the happening atmosphere. its supposed to illustrate how learning can take place outside the classroom and stuff. yes yes! i love learning outside the classroom!! haha. i am an ardent fan of I&E day! the principal is COOL to organise/approve of such cool stuff! she must like strawberry swiss roll too. haha.

oh me oh my! i saw mily that day!! i heard a "VANDA!" from across the road, turned, looked and holy cow! was it a friend? was it a foe? it was MILY!! lovely ol' mily =p i always picture mily singing..haha..i recognised her from her bag! yeah, the grey one =D its a good thing she was carrying it. i couldnt really see from acorss the road. =p isnt it great to run into old friends? theres this like, rush of familiarity and nostalgia.

its ZHILIANG'S birthday today! lets organise a party on this blog! haha. shucks, im really thirsty. i need water. Happy Birthday Zhiliang =D hey, remember when we called you barbie and sleazebag? haha..we TOTALLY have to meet up one day and exchange prezzies =p

i have so much more to say but ive just been stopped by the MPS-Mom Patrol Squad. playtime's over! haha.. its 130 now, goodnight!! =)

2006-03-19T07:34:00.000-08:00

eye mo tastes better than optodexine.

haha..not that i've intentionally drunk eye mo. you could say that ive had the misfortune of experiencing the aftertaste of optodexine in my throat. i went to the doctor this morning cuz my eyes were all itchy and i rubbed them and they turned red, but the itching wouldnt stop. anyway, turns out that it was an eye infection!! haha. cool. NOT. he gave me eye drops and by golly they are but miracle eye drops. a drop in each eye and voila! redness-be-gone! it was totally cool, i should have observed the transition of the redness subsiding! haha. but i had to type out my gp essay instead. at least i can go to school not looking like a freak tomorrow. i mean, they were REALLY red. it was like i had been deprived of sleep for centuries. oh, but here's the catch. the optodexine worked wonders for my eye, but it left a DISGUSTINGLY BITTER aftertaste in my throat!! some of it must have sneaked down my lachrymal ducts into my nose and then subsequently into my throat. euuuugh. xP i nearly died from all the gagging. i ate a sour plum candy to distract myself from the vileness of the thing. yes and needless to say, i regretted eating it.

i really like the music globe he gave me =D imagine a snow globe, but with three glass horses on a merry go round inside with a dial at the base to wind up to play music. i think there's something very magical about merry-go-rounds and circus tents. it sorta gives you that occasional burst of childishness, and that whole incredulous feeling of being in a childhood fantasy world, with a circus in the background and a ferris wheel with little flags flapping about on it. and the music makes it all so dainty and sweet and sugar-plum-fairy-ish and it just screams 'princess'. haha. there are also snowflakes on the base of the globe, which just adds on to that whole magical experience- the idea of snow falling in the winter time, during christmas..i mean, kudos to the packaging team. haha.

i spent 2 hours writing my gp essay just now! and i dont want to even think about what grade ill get for it. probably what i deserve, which is like, 0. touch wood. haha. the topics SUCKED! they're like the kind i would cross out immediately if they appeared in the exam. but sighhhhhh what to do? its not like they gave equal topic choices. freedom of choice my foot. haha. my just-ironed uniform is hanging on the door, staring at me sinisterly, with that malicious, sadistic snigger as if to say "whatcha gonna do huh? u have SCHOOL tomorrow. AH-HAHAHAH!!!" ah, school. =(

all 6 NAPFA items on tuesday!! not even a million bananas will save me this time.

2006-03-12T01:25:00.000-08:00

missed me?

haha. yes, after a million-year hiatus, im back. for those of you who consider me as your friend, you would already have known that..my bday was yesterday!! ha ha. it was totally cool. but then again, my bdays are always cool =D i wish i was born everyday. anyway, i went to taka and bought shoes! its one of those sandal thingies which are hard to describe, but when u seem them, you go ohhhhhhh so THATS the sandal thingy she was jabbering about. there were these 2 girls beside me trying on the same kind of sandal thingies and one of them was SO annoying. she went like, zhe ge hen sweet HOR? hen sweet LEH! hen sweeeeet! im like, oh PUKE! need we get all mushy and smushy and swoon over a pair of sandal thingies?? well, no doubt it was sweet and pink with a silver buckle and oozed sweetness appeal, but to go on and on and on about it is disgustingly gross. they didnt have my size so i couldnt buy it =( SHE didnt buy it either cuz like, 39 was too big and 38 was too small. HA.

minnie and huilin treated me to haagen daz yesterday! we ate chocolate fondue. its a fun dish to eat. haha. u get to dip stuff into the chocolate and strawberry dips and eat em. there was ice cream (14 mini balls), cookies, fruit, chocolate love-letters, pound cake (sara lee, probably). of course, i pushed the ice cream tray away immediately. haha. i mean, 14 balls? thats like Xtrim's sworn enemy. and boy was it expensive!!! but i was treated, so its okay =p thanks minnie and huilin for burning your pockets for me =D

joan, huey eng, ivan and i will be going to the gym next week. =p NAPFA is during first week of term 2!! shocking, really. how cruel can they be! and its not like my whole week is free to go to the gym regularly! monday, econ seminar, tues training, wed tuition, thurs some workshop thingy, friday..free!! teehee. for now. talking to winnie now! i havent been online in such a long time. (a million years, i think i mentioned that somewhere above) yay! i got a new room phone which looks like one of those antique phones with the giganormous receiver and copper coloured body. i love it. i hope more people call me from now on so that i can use it more =D

oh thank you class people for giving me the cutlery set! haha. if u must know, i used it immediately when i got home, for dinner =) and even though i dont eat with chopsticks, i will from now on! haha. ill ask mom to cook noodles more often.

and thanks J for the music box, i totally totally love it! its so pretty! with the little horsies inside. plus, the music is so pretty too! hee hee. dont you just love pretty things?

thanks fioni and pussy for the candy machine! haha. its so cute in all its miniature-ness.

i hope i havent left out anyone in my thanks. and THANK YOU everyone else for rememebering my bday and wishing me. thanks a lot! its friends like you who make birthdays so memorable =D

2006-02-18T08:36:00.000-08:00

CRAP! crappity crap! crappy crapsicles!

there's the NTU competition next week ='( im scared. haha. no, SERIOUSLY. i am. ive never been very competitive. and i hate competitions of any sort =( especially the kind when your individual performance affects the performance of the whole team. what if because of me the marks are pulled down???? because of MY and nobody else's SUCKY PERFORMANCE??? im scared. shut up, i know im a big ol' scaredy cat. but this big ol' scaredy cat is really afraid of competition. ='( as in, if like, we were in a group or something, like in primary school when we joined the syf for handbells, theres not so much pressure . you know? YOU KNOW? oh, charles is shooting too!! heehee i saw his name on the guys' list. i was actually looking for kaiyuan, but tada! i saw charles instead. heheh. he seems quite..confident. its scary. everything is scary!!!!!!!! im standing beside this CJ girl whose name is melissa. doesnt the name 'melissa' make her sound like she's really pro??????? save me.

next week is a shitty week!!! there's math test on wednesday, training on monday, wed and thurs, bio spa on friday, and competition on saturday!!! OMG. will i live to write about this? charles said his coach tells them to do a full detail once in a while. WE'VE never even tried shooting 40 shots, let alone done a full detail. the panic is REALLY starting to kick in. i would say im scared shitless but that isnt a very pleasant phrase to publish on this family-friendly blog. how how how? SHIT. F. HOW????????!!!!!!!!!!!! someone, please save me. im freaking out.

I HATE NEXT WEEK. =( OH FISH. RESULTS ARE COMING OUT TOO. THAT MEANS MY CHINESE AND PROJECT WORK. FISH. fish never tasted this good. i feel..stressed. i like fish.

2006-01-28T07:59:00.000-08:00

i dont like eating. it makes me fat. everything i eat makes me fat. i dont like to eat. and whats worse, when my parents are home, i HAVE to eat my meals. they wont take "im not hungry" for an excuse. and it sucks. its not that im not grateful that i have food to eat, unlike the starving poor in africa. i appreciate that there's food on the table should i be happen to want it, but 9 out of 10 times, i DONT want it. it makes me fat. i have a disgusting fat tummy after eating. even after drinking. its only me, right? nobody else gets a stupid tummy after eating or DRINKING, for that matter. why must they make me eat? i reckon i can survive splendidly on my stored material. they should just let me eat when im hungry. whats so wrong about that??? yeah yeah regular meals whatever. people shouldnt eat when they're not hungry. and they shouldnt be made to eat either. this is an outrage! i must lodge a complaint to the Dieter's Association and grieve about my plight along with fellow dieters. ah shit there's like AQ to do before thursday. plus, there's chem test!! silly ol teachers. they have no regard for tradition!! the book of chinese tradition states that Homework Shall not be Given to be due Less Than a Week After Chinese New Year. they fail to recognise and appreciate the full value of a festival regarded as the most important in chinese culture. how dare they! and oh please, its not like my organic chem rocks. i have to memorise all that crap. saying that bio needs far more memory work is NOT a counter argument. org chem is just like memorising this list of temperatures and reagents and conditions and whatnot. and he doesnt like me. actually, i think he doesnt like us. nobody does!! a certain teacher practically ignores the back row people. she cant even hear me when i speak! or perhaps she refuses to listen. my own teacher!! ZL is such an enigma. haha. im going to gain weight during CNY. i just KNOW it. FFFFFFFFFF. im never going to eat lunch in school anymore. scratch that. im never going to eat ANYTHING in school anymore.

2006-01-19T02:59:00.000-08:00

WOO! i feel refreshed after PE =p we ran 10 rounds today! haha..well, ACTUALLY it was 2 rounds warm up and then 8 rounds. and its all thanks to that banana i ate for lunch! otherwise i highly doubt i would have been able to last out there. bananas are sorely underrated, seemingly insignificant fruit, but as of today, i strongly advocate eating a banana before running! haha. and thats precisely what im gonna do for monday's PE. banana for breakfast, anyone?

I LOVE BANANAS! OOH AH AH AH OOH AH AH AH. then again, maybe the fruits stall aunty spiked the banana with ecstacy. they were having this fruits stall sale in school. buy 2 fruits and get 1 free =D its part of Health Week, in a fervent bid to encourage the healthy habit of fruit gormandising. haha.

they also pasted all these health facts like the amount of calories and fat and whatnot around the school. i must say, i have emerged from this past week a more informed health fanatic. =p and by golly, there's only one day left in health week!

some nike and aasics supplier came to sell sports stuff for SUPER discounted prices!! i bought a pink nike bottle. heehee. everyday, i gaze, enchanted by the beauty of my bottle, speechless, enthralled by my astute colour sense. the sports bras were also heavily discounted. and they were so colourful too!! i think they slashed the prices by at least 20 bucks. 50 to 30. go on, girls, drop your jaws in envy and disbelief! haha. and you dont even get to choose from such a nice, colourful selection in those nike stores! i didnt buy any though. haha. i mean, its not like i get to admire it all the time, it being inside my clothes. which is not the case for my bottle. =D

i really really need to work on IPU. stupid thing. and why does the napfa always have to be after my birthday =( its SO unfair, not like people born in december are any weaker than i am!! the only difference is standing broad jump, and for 17 year olds, its 190 and NOT 193. hmmph.

did you watch american idol?? haha..some of them were so bizarre! like the statue of liberty guy and the other dude whose grandmother decided to stand up for him and confront simon. like THAT would help improve his voice quality. my nose-o-meter tells me that dinner should be arriving very soon. ciaO!

2006-01-14T08:04:00.000-08:00

HAHA. i have just demarcated the 193cm spot on the hall floor with nice yellow ribbon which is pleasing to the eye. you guessed it! its for STANDING BROAD JUMP. and im gonna practise! i got a stupid B last year cuz i kept losing my stupid balance. but it seems pretty daunting, 193. i know i know, there are lotsa girls out there who can clear the 200cm mark and they're all probably like, geez, what's a hundred and ninety-three lousy centimetres? haha.

oh and like, they increased the criteria to get A for 2.4 by 30 seconds! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! crazy NAPFA association people. i dont think my guess deviates far from the truth when i say that the committee is probably made up of depressed souls who have been deprived of physical education in their youth. and now they're all like, "i want future generations to be srtonger! and fitter! more macho! like bulls, not cows! like men, not mice! so i shall raise the standard of each station to an extremely high one to make people fret about getting their As! *cue evil, gleeful cackle*"

good gracious, i think i shall execute my first Practice Jump tomorrow. (and thereafter feel ashamed of my pathetic attempt.) i marked out 187, 190 and 193. i HOPE i dont have to mark out anything lower. but then, 193 is like a bordeline A. it's risky!! oh what the hell, dunno if i can even make it there. =(

i hate chem practical now!! darn crystals thingy. i was heating my whatchamightcallit..um um..oh right, conical flask on the hot plate on the teacher's bench, and then when my back was turned, the lab technician came in and threw it all away!!!!!!!!!! and my weighing was a perfect 2.5g too! arrrgh to the highest degree.

she flushed my potential fruits of labour down the sink, and away into the sewer, to where lurks the unknown. why dont these lab sessions ever work out for me?!!! i was the only loser who without a packet of crystals.

bio lab was fun though, we got to make our own little beads. u had to use this glass rod and dip it into yeast-alginate solution, and then drip it into calcium chloride, where each droplet will solidify into a bead. they were so cute! like those little IQ balls that you find in deserts. anwyay, i brought them home in a tiny bag, but sad to say, now, they exist only in the form of a painful memory. haha.. they got squashed and flattened when i put the tiny bag in my file and so i chucked them in the bin. =p my poor poor pearly beads. they could have been such great company.

i dont like shopping =( for clothes, anyway. nothing ever seems to look good on me. hmmm..i vaguely remember that i have once lamented about this very same issue. haha. but like, i tried on all this stuff and like, they just dont look nice on me! and then i got sick of trying stuff on cuz i got sick of having to keep removing my clothes just so i can stand in front of a full length mirror in new ones and cringe at the reflection.

i did the multiplier questions in the econ MCQ today and it was pretty fun. tee hee.

2006-01-11T05:45:00.000-08:00

To develop Singapore’s economy in its early years, Singapore relied heavily on multinational corporations which invested millions to produce goods and services in the country. However, the onset of globalisation, coupled with the rapid emergence of bigger economic players like India and china, could threaten to erode Singapore’s competitive advantage in the manufacturing industry, particularly for the low-end market.

Given India and china’s vast population, the two countries abound with human capital, and what’s more, it is available at a cheaper rate. This is one of the major pull factors which encourages many labour-intensive manufacturing firms to set up there instead of Singapore, where labour costs are comparatively higher.

Long considered an overpopulated, repressive, backward country, China has in the last decade entered the small circle of advanced industrial nations. The rising trend of such occurrences would mean that fewer companies are willing to invest in Singapore, all this despite her world-class infrastructure, cutting edge technology and human expertise. It could prove to be one challenge which Singapore may find hard to overcome in order to uphold her reputation as an international, investor-friendly, business hub.

To tackle this burgeoning problem, Singapore can focus more on cultivating a highly skilled and competent workforce by providing training for the future workforce, and also train our existing workforce. This constant renewal of skills and abilities must become part of the work culture. This is one way in which Singapore can hold her own in the world, and minimize the impact which cheap labour in other countries has on the employment opportunities and economic advancement in Singapore.

Globalisation could worsen income distribution in Singapore. Companies can shift their manufacturing operations to less developed countries like china and Indonesia in order to take advantage of the lower labour and land costs there. This makes unskilled workers in Singapore easily substitutable. This would also mean that lower-skilled Singaporeans could be faced with job losses and fewer job opportunities when these companies start shifting their operations to less developed countries where labour costs are much lower. They may also have to accept lower wages in order to keep their jobs in the company.

On the other hand, the wages of skilled personnel in Singapore will remain relatively stable as most of them would be working in knowledge-based industries, where human expertise and a high level of education are valued greatly. These individuals will be considered as more valuable assets to the company and are less likely to be retrenched should the company decide to outsource or shift operations. This leads to the gradually widening income gap between the higher and lower income groups in Singapore and the difference in income between the wealthy and the less well off becomes more marked. Income distribution is worsened. This could lead to an inaccurate representation of GNP per capita, as the bulk of the national income would be generated mainly by the rich.

A less equal income distribution could also lead to segregation between the rich and the poor in the country, giving rise to social problems such as decreased understanding and unity between all the citizens. This would pose a great problem to Singapore as unity and harmony among the residents are of utmost importance to this miniscule nation. Singapore must be wary not to allow the rich-poor divide to disrupt unity and togetherness in the nation.

Globalisation can pose a number of challenges, especially to small open economies like Singapore. The Asian crisis is one incident which has shown that financial integration acts like a magnifying glass on the domestic economy-multiplying the benefits of good policies but also increasing the costs of bas ones. We need to recognise that the forces driving globsalisation are irreversible and Singapore cannot afford to turn away from global market integration. The challenge for Singapore is therefore to maximise the benefits and minimize the costs of globalisation.

Globalisation blurs national boundaries and may potentially dilute our sense of identity. The dilution of our sense of national identity cannot be left unchecked, as it is the glue that holds the jigsaw of Singapore together. We have to ensure that Singaporeans remain engaged and interested in national issues. Singapore also needs to cultivate a core group of active citizens, young and old, passionate about making a difference to our community, whether through volunteer work or causes that excite them and bring social benefit.

2006-01-04T07:58:00.000-08:00

im peeling! this is disgusting. im filling my entire room with dead skin cells. u know how when u peel ur dried sunburnt skin off, theres this tearing sound? its just GROSS!! haha. i cant wear sleeveless anymore. but thats okay! i am metamorphosising into a beautiful butterfly. shedding the old, embracing the new! a new skin, a new me, for a new year! haha. ill blog tml.

2005-12-30T08:21:00.001-08:00

The dummies' guide to Ways to Tell You've Been Sunburnt:

1. a bunch of bearded fishermen with huge nets start chasing you yelling "GIANT LOBSTER! IT'S GETTING AWAY!"

2. you get mobbed at the Ice Cream Fair because people mistake you for a walking, tri-coloured, metropolitan flavoured ice cream. (red, brown and white)

3. you would rather be caught wearing your jammies in orchard road than wear strappy items of clothing like say for example, a brassiere, because they cut into your red, sore skin.

4. bath time becomes a complete torment because you cringe everytime you towel dry.

5. you seem to disappear in a strawberry farm.

i cant believe im actually talking to menghee now. haha. its been YEARS since i last talked to him online. the last time was when he called me FAT and then we stopped talking. haha. he's my primary school classmate anyway. he was an index number behind me =p saw him at the 6D gathering that day! haha. he says i havent changed much since then in that im still 'quite talkative'. i guess im selectively talkative. i didnt say much at the air rifle outing yesterday.............i bet they think im some introvert. haha.

my mom has to go for this minor operation thing. she says its not serious and shit. but I DONT BELIEVE HER. im gonna force her to go for the op, and ill threaten not to eat lunch in school until she does. i swear ill do it. thats one of her greatest concerns you know? me not eating. HAH. well, that'll make her reconsider her decision.

as u may have already firgured out, i've been fried by the sun. my shoulders and back have never been so red before!! uh, maybe thats because i didnt wear halter tops to the beach in the past. haha. anwyay, my shuolders are BLOODY SORE!! and bloody red too. like the pun? haha. although my neck's turned brown since yesterday. u can see the shape of the top i wore! the covered parts are stark white and the exposed parts are crimson. i think i would scream bloody murder if anyone so much as tapped my shoulder. my arm's sore too! from playing captain's ball in the water =p

2005-12-29T08:01:00.000-08:00

Ugly-Sugababes

When I was 7
They said I was strange
I noticed that my eyes and hair weren't the same
I asked my parents if I was OK
They said you're more beautiful
And that's the way they show that they wish
They had your smile
So my confidence was up for a while
I got real comfortable with my own style
I knew that they were only jealous cos

People are all the same
And we only get judged by what we do
Personality reflects name
And if I'm ugly then
So are you
So are you

There was a time when I felt like I cared
That I was shorter than everyone there
People made me feel like life was unfair
And I did things that made me ashamed
Cos I didn't know my body would change
I grew taller than them in more ways
But there will always be the one who will say
Something bad to make them feel great

People are all the same
And we only get judged by what we do
Personality reflects name
And if I'm ugly then
So are you
So are you

People are all the same
And we only get judged by what we do
Personality reflects name
And if I'm ugly then
So are you
So are you

Everybody talks bad about somebody
And never realises how it affects somebody
And you bet it won't be forgotten
Envy is the only thing it could be

Cos people are all the same(The same, the same)
And we only get judged by what we do(What we do, yeah, yeah)
Personality reflects name
And if I'm ugly then(Yeah, you)
So are you
So are you

People are all the same(Oh, oh, oh)
And we only get judged by what we do(What we do, yeah)
Personality reflects name
And if I'm ugly then(Yeah, so are you)
So are you
So are you

2005-12-23T07:55:00.000-08:00

*COUGH COUGH* *HACK HACK*

MY THROAT IS DYING. correction: MY THROAT HAS DIED. it hurts like hell now cuz of all the coughing activities ive been engaging in since yesterday. the poor thing! i bet its all red and bloody and gross now. i bet its craving for a strepsil. but im too lazy to reach over to get it.

hee went out with the 6D '00 people yesterday!! i LURRVE them all! 6D rocks!! it was just so cool meeting up with everyone =) apparently, most of the 6D pp are in SR now. cool!

haha oh god this is hilarious. brandee asked me if i was spending christmas with my boyfriend. im like, DUUUDE! im super single like a bedsheet. haha.

I DONT FEEL LIKE BLOGGING TODAY. maybe after christmas, then i can write about what i got and WHO i got stuff from. *hint*

2005-12-21T08:15:00.000-08:00

ebase is really smart. ebase is run by geniuses!! have you noticed how the lighting is particularly dim in the ebase shop? BECAUSE WE LOOK BETTER IN DIM LIGHTING! and that encourages us to purchase their products cuz we THINK we look good in them, when actually its cuz of the flattering light=big bucks rolling in=revenue maximisation=inevitably means profit maximisation=wealthy proprietors.

6D gathering tml!! woohoO! haha..thats my primary school class, anyway =) we have a gathering every YEAR! more specifically, at the end of every year. yayyy. haha. going to marina bay again, though =p under other circumstances, i would say that marina bay is losing its excitement value, but i guess its the company that matters most. =D

ooh went to the gym today again! haha. this gym thing, i could get used to. and NO, not because there are any eye candy around or whatever. i hate that phrase. 'eye candy'. its getting SO overused. i weighed myself, and i gained weight from last week! about 500g. !!!!!!!!!!!! so i ate salad for lunch just now. surprisingly, the BK chicken salad portion is quite large! but there was MAYO. fat alert. i actually swore on not eating, but then, a salad sounded pretty harmless. i hope. oh my god STEAMBOAT tml!! lunch would best be taken skipped.

mom is outright gross!!!! i bought this halter top thingamajig, and she was like, why did you buy this kind of top?! what if someone pulls it from behind? sickened by the thought that she actually mentioned it, i said, DONT BE GROSS LA! gosh. the things mothers worry about. i need longer hair though. but then again, there'd be no point in wearing one.

jing is going tml! jing, the greatest baker on earth! and also the most generous one, cuz i get freebies!! heehee. the last piece of confectionery she made was cheesecake, of which i was most fortunate to receive a slice. a slice of her efforts. a slice of her sweat! a slice of her friendly love!! haha.

2005-12-19T02:24:00.000-08:00

today SO sucked! i give it a 2/10. i woke up feeling a little dizzy and so i took an unusually long time in the bathroom (bathing, of course) and like, i had 5 minutes left to eat and change before going to air rifle. how ridiculous! so anyway, i rushed off to school, feeling 1/2 dizzy. and then i thought, how stupid is this?! how can i possibly aim properly when the world around me is in constant motion?! i did, anyway. and well, of course the card turned out sucky. which therefore made the day quite sucky.

conclusion: dont attempt to shoot if ure feeling dizzy.

i mean, it just doesnt work. dizziness--> masks ability to balance--> off focus--> ugly card. i might as well have been aiming while trying to skateboard. luckily the coach didnt ask me for the card. and its stupid how i felt better AFTER the training! what the hell for right?!

anyway, we had a mass copying session at the library. haha! the source of reference being wenhui's work. oh my god copied math like siao la. it got totally boring and sian! even though my brain was having a holiday.

oh and OH MY GOD there was this couple sitting behind us who were practically making out. on behalf of everyone, THE GENERAL PUBLIC DO NOT CONDONE PUBLIC DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION, DAMMIT. for gods sake! we could HEAR THEM kissing. like, WTF man!! go to a secluded alley or something.

i could see the reflection in the window in front. haha.. although i must say, such behaviour does provide entertainment and a good laugh or two. i know, its rude to watch other people get all touchy feely. but oh come ON. they should have chosen a spot where they would have been less noticeable.

then again, the state should fund the construction of public 'making out areas'. i shall write to the president! haha..what with their fervent emphasis on expanding the population. oh, but then again, they'd have to beef up their campaign on using protection........so, nevermind.

do mushroom buns contain lotsa cholesterol? cuz like, that would NOT be good news. i had it for lunch. and THREE chipsmore biscuits. or is it chips ahoy? why cant these biscuit companies use more distinctive names?! sheesh. i SUPPOSE you could say but i didnt have breakfast. but the biscuits more than make up for it, dont they? argh. oh whatever.

i hope the air rifle outing is at the beach! christeeee said calvin wanted dinner only. but but but..cant we go beach first then dinner! i mean, you DO need to eat after a day at the beach right? i havent been to the beach in a long time. heheh.

i feel that im getting fairer. am i?????? im getting fairer and fairer. haha..its okay, i guess. i used to LOATHE being fair, and then there was a phase where i loathed being dark, but seriously, i couldnt give 2 hoots about it now! after all, BEAUTY IS ONLY SKIN DEEP. =p haha..

i like malcolm's nick. it says
'pretty heart, pretty face, each sold separately'

i guess thats pretty much true for most of us huh? haha..my apologies if u represent the exceptional minority.

2005-12-17T06:46:00.000-08:00

ahhh shiiit. i feel so bloody fat. can people gain weight in 2 days? we went to the gym on thursday. me, huey eng, joanie, jessica stone and ivan. haha. i didnt dare weigh myself cuz the scale was digital, and we all know how grossly accurate digital scales can be. got decimal place somemore! but anyway, THE TRUTH IS NOT SOMETHING TO BE FEARED.

anyway, i lost weight. like, ????!!!!!!!!!! so happy that i lost weight! yayyyyy. haha..YAYYYYYYYYYYY!! but then yesterday i ate ICE CREAM. the culprit of all culprits, the demon of all demons, the primary cause of weight gain in people who lead sedentary lifestyles and who have depressingly slow metabolic rates.

AHHHHHHHHHHH. ITS ALL HUILIN'S FAULT!! she offered me a ya kun ice cream toast thingy, which piqued the curiosity of my sugar-starved tastebuds. and then we had another round of ice cream at swensons, celebrating gerladine's 117th birthday. the sin of all sins. im so sorry, thighs and waist. time and again, i let you down. =(

my tummy gets bigger after eating! WHY?! its not normal, is it?? i see other people maintaining their bloody flat abs even after stuffing themselves silly. this is so unfair. i must write a letter of complaint to the Tummy Association and demand some sort of compensation to make up for the irreparable damage the have subjected mine to. i feel guilty after eating a proper meal. seriously.

i have been such a sickie today. in the words of mr sanuse. haha. or is it mr sanusi? whatever. i woke up this morning with a monsterous body ache and a terrible sore throat. flu right! but i had no fever, Thus, it wasnt the flu. mom gave me some painkiller thingamajigs and i felt instantly better after taking em. but she still made me eat lunch. which thereafter inspired me to contemplate the pros and cons of puking. the con outweighed the pro though, it being that the aftertaste of puke is not something remotely pleasant.

here's an observation i've made:

1. most singaporean females above the age of 20 look alike. (long, rebonded hair etc) i guess most people think its SAFER to keep long hair, even though practically 90% of the female population have it.

2. "all i want for christmas is my two front teeth' is grammatically wrong. i mean, maybe im slow on this one and maybe the whole world has already known this since the first time they heard it.

i borrowed Philosophy for Dummies =p cool huh. its so intriguing and insightful and intellectually stimulating. i wish we could study philosophy from a young age. it makes you question things in life that might otherwise and, very commonly so, be taken for granted. oh and DID YOU KNOW?? socrates was sentenced to death by being made to consume poison.

"Many of the young people in Athens were impressed with socrates' razor-sharp intellect and often followed him about, imitating his probing style of conversation and offending even more people. in fact, by the age of 70, socrates and his follwers had angered so many rominent citizens in Athens that he was accused and tried on the two trumped-up charges of corrupting the youth and of not believing in the gods of the city but following other gods instead."

haha..i love philosophy. i love Philosophy. its so much more worth reading and studying in great detail than say, math. no offence to all you math geniuses out there.

The unexamined life is not worth living- Socrates. SO. Do not be washed along the sea of life blindly, or believe in things Just Because, or reduce the rhythm of life to a dull, pathetic monotone. Life should be colourful, meaningful, enriching and FUN. Do things for a reason, and believe in things because you have reason to. That's basically what i got out of reading 35 pages of Philosophy for Dummies. there's more to come, so stay tuned to this blog for more bitesized snippets of Philosophy. haha.

2005-12-13T22:07:00.000-08:00

the 'new coach' didnt come today! she was supposed to, but apparently she was bogged down with matters of the loo. haha..lets just say she had a continuous bout of defecation. we've been coachless for 2 sessions already! i wonder what happened to the older dude, he's such a granfather figure =D he's funny too. haha.

i was kinda thinking about what i was gonna blog about after training, and then i considered something like 'i hate shooting' cuz really, the first card SUCKED. i immediately disposed of it, too ashamed to even glance at it. but anyway, i changed my mind later on cuz the 4th card was quite cool. quite nice la..haha..we had this like mini competition thingy, girls against guys, but there were only 3 girls so chris joined us =p and..we won both times! ha ha! the guys were supposed to give a TREAT, and sakae sushi sounded good. but sadly, they didnt. VERY gentlemanly, hor? =p

oh god my ear has been itching like crazy these days! and its not even the new hole! its the old one. i think its jealous because my priorities have been diverted to the new one and i havent been lavishing as much attention on it as i should be. it gets all pus-sy and sticky and stuff! and i have to keep wiping all the goo away with tissue. but it STILL KEEPS COMING BACK TO HAUNT ME. will it never stop? even blood stops spewing out after a while! what is this! maybe i dont have platelets. haha.

went out with him yesterday..well..to study la..but i thought..that it was really nice. yeaH..heh..but i guess..it was only for a day..

oh cooooooL..adrienne is gonna shoot in the next SEA games!! cool..she didnt go this year cuz they had alevels and stuff..waaaaaaaasted la..haha, i would have loved to see her on TV. i heard some HCI girl/guy got 2nd in SEA games, beaten by thailand. haha. SEA games seems so last century already.

Gosh..a million tissue boxes later, things are still the same. The individual's perception, anyway.

oh, might i make a recommendation for the next song you download? this song below is a really awesome track! its sentimental and stuff, and well, if you read it, it sounds really sad too. but i guess thats the whole beauty of Songs which Depress the Soul. anyway, listen to it, if you havent. plus, its all piano. really slow and well..i guess you could call it romantic, if the words werent so miserably depressing. haha. i think im gonna request for it on radio soon! on young's show. my favy fave! he always reads out my dedications! heh.

James Blunt-Goodbye my lover

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,I
am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry,
I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I'm so hollow, baby,
I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.

2005-12-09T07:55:00.000-08:00

i pierced my ear today!

heehee. and whats more, i went with Mother. who would have thought this situation would be possible in reality? anyway, i asked "can i pierce my ear?" well, of course, i just asked out of politness and nothing more, because i would have got it pierced ANYWAY. sometimes, its good to let your parents think they can control you. haha. she went all "another one?" but i clarified matters with her and told her i would pierce the right instead of the the left, which has already reached full population. is there a word for it? ummm optimal capacity or some crap like that? haha. so NOW, its a 4left, 3right. i SWEAR its gonna be the last one i pierce. i saw this picture of an ear and it had 9 freaky piercings on it. and it was SO freakish and gross and ewwwww and blehhh and..do i look like THAT?! 4 isnt a lot right? RIGHT? its normal to have 4. lotsa people have 4. and they're normal too.

i was kinda looking at the big picture today and thinking, everything seems so small scale, come to think of it. i mean, how the world works and stuff. like, people build homes for other people to live in. people organise competitions to see whos the best at doing whatever. even international and national competitions seem so..made up. like, everything is just for us to enjoy and make the most out of life. it seems like this game, where u spend all the time thats alloted to you and then you leave, never to return. ITS LIKE THIS GAME. but then its not a game because people have feelings and they develop relationships with other people and staying in the game is really important to them. and OH CRAP. i am a nonsensical nonsense machine. i bet none of this makes sense to you. nono, not that u people are dumbasses or anything, dont get me wrong. haha.

oh my gosh we are finally going to the gym next week! goodbye fat! haha. i asked ivan if guys normally make a beeline for the weights section or something, and he said he didnt want bulging, he wanted toned. haha. i asked jessica already, but then she said she had some camp, but i BET she's just laaaaaaaaazy. haha. oh my god! i bet she has plans to stone! her stoning acitivities take precedence over everything else, the traitor! haha. YES. we shall go back to school toned, bronzed and maybe for ivan, rippling with a 100-pack. haha. yesterday's class outing was an astounding failure. only 5 people turned up!! huey eng, joan, ivan, kevin and me! haha. but it was fun, we went to marina square and ate cafe cartel and played arcade. i love the drum set thingy! i love the music, anyway. its all so cute. the fuzzy wuzzy widdle machine.

SHIT. i just realised something bad. SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT.

2005-12-06T23:50:00.000-08:00

last day of work attachment!! oh my gosh, im probably never going to see gabriel and ihui again. today, william treated us to lunch at some chicken rice stall. i hate departures, dont you? 4E1 chalet ended today too..so its like a double goodbye. feeling pretty/kinda/sorta/a lil bit/actually very sad now. the nanyang people like, see each other all the time and stuff. absence..makes the heart grow fonder.

and i barely talked to him. no, scratch that. i didnt get to talk to him at all. well i did say hello at the bbq but that was it. like, really. one pathetic hello. sometimes i envy other people for being able to talk to him like..like friends at least. now it just feels like we're strangers. its just really really really sad. you know. i know. i am pathetic. im just some freaking pathetic bloody emotional..freak. dont tag about this please.

anyway, i had lots of fun with the girls. =) i was kinda disappointed when mf said she was going home, cuz then the rest would go home too and there's be virtually be no more girls left there. im so thankful they decided to stay. i love them all. tee hee. me and geraldine and sharon learnt the entire barney song from huishan. haha! it was so cool, we were singing it on the way to tampines last night.

we turned out the lights when zl was in the bathroom. haha. i swear its been a long time since i laughed so hard. we were planning to rap on the door and tell him that his time was up, and then turn off the lights. but we never got to doing that cuz he came out and went to the other bathroom. haha..and he locked the room door and told junwei not to open it or something. so spoiler. haha.

zhiliang ure so mean. u dao me one.

thanks MF!! for bringing my bag there. ure incredibly kind. =D it was so funny teaching karen mahjong. she had these long decorated-with-flower-stickers fingernails and like, she had to be careful when handling the tiles, so she looked like a taitai playing, with her fingers spread out, like she was afraid of breaking a nail. i cant believe im actually laughing now.

Barney is a dinosaur
from our imagination
And when he's big
he's what we call a dinosaur sensation

Barney's friends are big and small
They come from lotsa places
And after school they meet to play
And sing with happy faces

Barney teaches lotsa things
Like how to play pretend
ABCs and 123s
And how to be a friend

Barney comes to play with us
Whenever we may need him
Barney can be your friend too
If you just make believe him

learn this stuff by heart. because..

Barney Rocks!

2005-11-30T21:24:00.000-08:00

hah! im blogging this in the office now. all the Adults are out for lunch. haha..today's like muscle-ache day! woke up with a terrible arm and shoulder strain. i just realised we didnt do warmups yesterday! oh man, this morning was TOTALLY boring. im SO sick of KI already! at least PW was something we know about, unlike this alien subject. haha. i hope the Adults dont come back anytime soon. im not done typing this yet. and they might think im carrying out a slacking activity. we're supposed to work on a report for tml about KI. but SERIOUSLY, i dont really have much to say about KI! ate a curry potato cheese bun for lunch. haha..sounds weird doesnt it? but i liked it. i like buns. haha. the edible kinds, anyway. buns of flour.

oh RIGHT, saw this woman walking out of the mrt station this morning. she was totally swinging her butt like crazy, sashaying out of everybody's way. im like, oh PUH-LEEZ, chio then chio lah! no need to swing until like that right! maybe guys would find it attractive and sexy and whatnot, but to me, it just looks stupid and a silly way to put your ATP to use.

oh gosh. i hear the Adults. i dont know if im even allowed to use this. they're afraid we might oh i dont know, gain access to some secret examination files or the blueprint of the Earth Destructor 3000 or whatever. better publish this thing now! i see gabriel playing minesweeper. haha.

haha..i was mistaken. those are the Adults from the other department. the english dept people are still out lunching. working here seems quite fun, from the looks of it. they're always hanging around each other's cubicles/WORKSTATIONS, laughing and joking and talking about the chicken little song. you know, the annoying one! the one which has been turned into some gross chinese pop song or something. haha.

oh YAY i read winnie's email yesterday and HE'S giong to organise the class outing. good job, winnie! *applauds and hoots wildly* what a great bear. bloody hell im trying to play some game on miniclip but the stupid thing is blank. haha..i hope there isnt some secret room with little screens where the security guards gather and check on what we're doing. they might come and snatch the game from me. oh gabriels asleep at the desk now. haha. wonder what ihui is doing.

i saw ong eng wen this morning! i couldnt recognise him cuz he wasnt wearing his glasses and stuff! i was walking behind him and well, he sorrrrrrrrrrta looked familiar from the back and so i took a chance and yelled "MR ONG!" haha. slowly he turned around. i bet he wished i didnt call him that cuz before i turned in to the MOE building, he said something like "im not your teacher anymore" or was it "dont call me mr ong". haha somewhere along those lines.

i see lots of uni people in the train. cuz NUS and NTU are both on the same line! *ahem* they probably think im one of them. you know, given how mature i appear and my tall uni-like height. ha-ha.

SHIT i have been sitting in this position for far too long. now my shoulder ache is acting up again. they're going to the gym later. but i cant do anything besides run seeing as i cant lift anything. shit theyre back.

2005-11-29T23:58:00.000-08:00

hey! just came back from the clay target shooting lesson. haha..it was really cool..got to go to the national shooting centre at choa chu kang and had to pass so many cemeteries and crematoriums on the way there. =p shotgun is really cool..its so unlike rifle. and im such a weakling!! my left arm was already trembling after holding the thing for about 3 rounds. and its not like rifle where you can rest your elbow on your hip, cuz you gotta support the shotgun with just your left hand and arm. he said shotguns are about 3kg only, which makes them lighter than air rifles, but i couldnt support the thing for long though. haha..why's my left arm so bloody weak?!

anyway, shotguns recoil! and now my right shoulder/arm junction is totally red and bruised. well, its more on the bruisey side than red. it was totally red during the session. if i had fired anymore, i think the area would start bleeding. heheh. i might as well have no skin at all.

the recoil part was quite a shock at first! like, after you fire the thing, whoa! you feel the impact. and my left arm is totally suanned-out now, i couldnt even wash my hair properly! i was spreading the shampoo and then wahhhhhhh so suaaaaan so in the end, i only used my right hand to shampoo. haha..dont worry, im still clean, so its safe to come near me! and after the bath i tried to tie my hair, but i had to lean to the left cuz my left arm was suan and i couldnt really hold it up to my head for long. haha.

we did 3 kinds of shooting. Trap, skeet and double trap. in trap, the clay target comes flying vertically up from a distance. in skeet, there are 2 types. the first is where the target flies kinda like in your direction, from the opposite. i mean, of course its not directly at you lah. haha.. yeah so you have to 'track' the thing, which is to follow it with the gun and then shoot it a bit in front of and below the target, kinda like in the south-west direction. and theres another type of skeet, where the target flies from behind you instead of from the opposite direction. i dunno why, but that one's more difficult. to me, at least. haha..maybe its just me.

double trap is something like trap but 2 targets come vertically out at same time, side by side and you have shoot one after the other. and the coolest thing is, every time you want the target to fly out, as in, when ure ready to shoot, u have to say 'pull' into the mike! and its all like voice-activated and the system will respond by making the target(s) fly out from their lairs. haha. I think its cool! actually you dont have to say pull, just any one-word command, but thats sorta like the standard =p chris said 'fly' though. haha. there are different directions in which the target can fly. we also tried one where it was flying in the north-west direction instead of vertical.

oh and its really loud too! he gave us ear plugs to shove into our ears and that REALLY helps a lot. chris forgot to wear his when the guy was shooting and ha ha ha..well, you know what happened. the ammo was cool! there are like, 300 pellets in each um, thingy. what do you call those? the pellet house??? haha..theyre quite big, like a C-sized battery. the gunfire is cool too! i think everything was cooL! the gunfire, the loud 'boom!', the recoil, the earplugs..and even the bruises. haha..cuz its the first time i did something so..real. i mean, they use these to go crow-hunting. you need a license for that, though =p i forgot which is the one which can kill humans from 300m away! damn.

i skipped work attachment today to go for this! im glad i did, cuz it'll probably be something i wont get to do anymore! taking it up as a hobby is REALLY expensive, like $90 a day, for 2 boxes of ammo. i mean, i dont know about you, but i dont have that kind of money to splurge on shooting flying clay targets regularly =p

we saw some guys shooting with pistols too, and it was cool, cuz there are different steps when shooting different guns, and for pistol, the target card is huge! haha..cuz its like a one-hand thing. but the bullets are cooL! i mean, they're like the kinds you see in movies where the golden bullet holders or whatever come flying out from the back of the pistol and drop to the ground after they've been fired. haha..

i thought shotgun was really cool cuz you get to see gunfire and experience the recoil! but air rifle training is starting soon..should switch back to the AR mode already. haha.

2005-11-28T03:02:00.000-08:00

today was so boring!! we were given these KI resources and were supposed to look through them and like, critique them and stuff. and believe me, KI is SUPER chim! its something like philosophy, you get to study about the theory of knowledge, how knowledge comes about and stuff. seems interesting huh? but you should see the questions. it makes GP look like a piece of blackforest cake. its very philosphical. they even make reference to plato and aristotle and the socrates method of questioning (or something like that. this mountain tortoise is too ignorant to be in possession of such high level thinking anwyay.)

oh yes, back to the boring-ness of today's activities. as expected, it got rather boring reading stuff that we're not very familiar with. haha..so after reading for a short period of time (this is debatable, however), i was lured into playing computer hearts by well, the computer. contrary to popular belief, the computer is not simply an inanimate object with a programmed mind. i must admit, it has superb persuasion skills. haha..anwyay,

the computer, aware of the ease of influencing my mind, said "come play hearts with me. you know you want to."

"oh shut up, you box of chips, im trying to familiarise myself with all this advanced KI stuff which is so not my turf."

"but im lonely and i need a companion. someone like YOU."

and then my heart melts at this seemingly sincere compliment.

and the rest is history.

ihui was playing civilisation 4 or something..and gabriel was reading. haha..and i played about a bazillion rounds of hearts. if this keeps up, my hearts-ing skills will improve drastically.

oh, then he let me play world of warcraft. heehee. ive never played warcraft before. but the laptop was quite laggy and like, the character kept jerking forward. haha. like a Jerk. i always pick the ugliest, most grotesque one, for some reason. its an innate inclination.

i was in the train this morning and there was this woman sleeping with her mouth open. haha..not a very flattering position either. for the whole journey, i couldnt help staring at her. well actually, not to be mean or anything, but i was sorta anticipating a sliver of drool to trickle down her chin. haha. thankfully, it didnt.

so here's a tip: never sleep on public transport unless

1 before your head lolls back involuntarily, be ABSOLUTELY certain that you've positioned yourself in a flattering, camera-friendly sleep-sitting position. this will ensure that candid shots of an unconscious you might well be worth millions should they be circulated on the net.

2 you seal your lips with tape, glue or quick-drying cement.

2.1 alternatively, if you're on a budget and have a sweet tooth, kill two birds with one stone and use peanut butter in place of the aforementioned self-adhesive items.

3 you order the driver to seal the eyes of all boarding passengers and make no exception, except for perhaps the occasional blind passenger. To do so, see points 2-2.1.

4 you are a supermodel and do not have any unflattering angles.

5 you wear a bag over your head to save yourself the humiliation of being recognised/spotted by a plastic surgery company to pose for the 'before surgery' picture. (note: you might want to cut little holes in said bag to be certain that you do not fall into morpheus' arms forever)

Don't say you weren't warned.

2005-11-25T06:24:00.000-08:00

HIM HOCK KIM ALEX WINNIE POOH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YOU BEAR!!!!!!!!!!

oh please please please be reading this before 12mn on the 25th.

today was more fun than yesterday! i went there at 9 on the dot and gabriel and i-hui hadnt arrived yet and like, i was just sitting at the work station stoning till they came and the air con might as well have been spoilt because it was SWELTERING in there!! i like how i-hui's name is spelt! kinda cool. =p it was really QUITE boring, writing the proposal. haha..but the guys were cool, so its okay. yesterday, i didnt really know them well yet, so it was quite weird and stuff. but today, its better. =)

we walked to holland V to eat again! and this time, at crystal jade! heheh. well, of COURSE it wasnt the restaurant one. the sun had already burned my brain out, it is not necessary that a similar hole should appear in my pocket. me and gabriel ate the la mian in sichuan style and it just tasted totally like peanut!!!!! in the picture, they just had this like, small lump of peanut paste on the lump of noodles, but when we mixed the thing in, the peanut was simply OVERWHELMING. i mean, WHAT sichuan??! i-hui treated us to the xiao long baos too! i ate 3 of them. =D

and after lunch we went to this party shop thingy which was AWESOME!! they had all these quaint party material! including those put in the water and watch them expand kinda toys and lollipops with worms frozen inside! and all these cool wigs and children's costumes. there was this winnie the pooh suit!! heehee. alex pooh, should have bought for you. =p but then again, i guess it already IS your birthday suit, no pun intended.

we got back to the office like, late. haha. william was like, you all a bit late hor? =p heh. i hope he isnt like, annoyed with us or anything. its only the second day!! oh and it turns out,ong eng wen was his student!! he was in charge of ELDDS back when he was taching in AJ. did i mention how most of the teachers there are associated with AJ somehow? either taught there or were from there! and william also said that there were lots of AJcians who joined the education industry. *majestically* it is only natural for the good people of AJC to join noble professions such as teaching.

i also realised that some office people are still SOOOO childishly girly! there's this lady, from i dont know which department, who's TOTALLY flirty in a girly way. as in, not the bitchy kind of flirty of course, the super girly kind. the link arms with other female colleagues kind. =p

WAS ANYONE LISTENING AT ALL to 987 say with it music with young last night? cuzzzzz i requested a song again and he played it and i love him! haha. but he didnt have 'life got cold' by girls aloud. bummer!! he played me sound of the underground. double bummer. i dont really like that song! i suppose they all have for the 'if they like song X from artist X, they'll probably like other songs from artist X' way of thinking.

fioni takes pictures of cats kissing!

like my nice coloured emphasised words? haha.

2005-11-24T02:55:00.000-08:00

i saw kevin today!! at some food court in holland V =p he had an attachment with biopolis, same as jing!! cooool. but they dont know each other. haha..he's grown more hair since the last time i saw him! and when was that? oh, only about 8 MONTHS AGO!! he used to be in my math group! and we would do this stupid celine-ee kent thing. well, back THEN. =p he'd go i say celine you say ee! then i would say kent! haha. so its kinda like I SAY CELINE YOU SAY EE! (KENT!) EE! (KENT!) haha.. so stupid. and then we would high five! so fun. i loved math last time!! especially with jolly ol' mr wee =p

oh right..work attachment today! i underestimated my walking speed, so i got to the outram station super early. haha i waited for 4 mrts to pass before taking the 5th one, but i was still at MOE the earliest. =p what is WITH these mrts? they come every 2 or 3 seconds. i SUPPOSE that's good news for the bulk of the working population who commute by the east-west line, but to people of my kind, its just horrid. haha. oh yeah! there was this really big sized guy who came to sit down beside me and was like,

"hello"
"uh hello!"
"so whats your name?"
"June." haha i was trying to pick a fako name fast, and i instantly thought of judith but then, oh nvm, so chim. so i said June. haha.
and he asked where i was going and stuff.
"can i be your friend?"
"sure!" HONESTLY, what could i say? oh shove off, ure creepy?
"can i have your number?"
"nope."
"but we're friends"
"you dont need my number, we're talking now"
"hahahaha"
"are u attached?"
"nope"
"thats a sin."
"to be unattached? WHY??!"
"-----" (bleeped out to save you from barfing)
"can i be your temporary boyfriend?"
"of course not!"
"just kidding just kidding ha ha ha ha"

(cue to board train)

WELL that was fun. =D i like talking to strangers. you're never gonna see them again. (hopefully not this one.)

the other 2 were CJ guys and they're in J2 this year, just finished exams yesterday. they take lit and i must say, their english is damn zhuai. haha. talk about articulate. actually, this was what i had been dreading all along, if the other 2 knew each other, id be sticking out like a sore pinky. but thankfully, they're both really nice. =) they're very outspoken. and we've all been to pre u sem! they went last year though. AND! they know claudio! =D theirs was at NUS and they said the hostels were really nice and stuff!! haha uhhhh nope, nobody's exactly complaining about the NTU hostels =p

mr wee, the guy to whom we were sorta attached to, said the minister comes quite often! but he has a separate lift to take, not the Commoner's Lift, i suppose. =p haha. they're all so jolly and jovial and friendly. it almost seems a joy working with one another there. they even have a gym, library, pool table and a foozball table there! haha..cool huh? oh and the lift is kinda cool too =p the security is SO tight there. well, i guess thats only logical, since people may sneak in to take a peek at exam papers. =D saw the woman who is responsible for the changes in PW!!!! PW may just be scrapped in the future. think 20 million years down the road. haha..

2005-11-21T00:02:00.000-08:00

oh myyy..went to toa payoh yesterday and i saw this guy, and i thought he looked quite shuai-ish and stuff. he was carrying this paddle and his shirt revealed that he was from NYJC dragonboat. cool huh? and then he turned around and i gasped like ive never gasped before, because it was jia jun!! haha..i hope i didnt pass out from astonishment. at least, i hope i wasnt gaping or staring at him like an bloomin idiot. and if i was, i hope he didnt see. haha. i couldnt believe it was jiajun. okay, dont get me wrong, im not suggesting that i what i thought of him before deviates greatly from what i saw yesterday. its probably cuz i havent seen him for so long. these shock-the-daylights-out-of-you things happen, you know.

i keep thinking qiaoru is in dragonboat! when in fact, she's pushing her thoracic cavity to its limits, singing her lungs out and charming the world with her heanvenly vocals in choir! =D hey! she should record a song to serenade me with. haha.

what a BORING day. we were supposed to go out today, but who knew suddenly everyone had stuff cropping up unexpectedly. hmmph. minyi isnt free till thursday, which coincidentally, happens to be the day the work attachment starts. so that effectively means ill never get to meet them in the day until 2 weeks later.

i did a bit of ecology tut today, though. =p celine asked yesterday when she, bobby and i could meet up for the bio peer-meeting-crappy thing. im saying its crappy only because..how am i supposed to peer tutor them?! i dont think they even NEED it. i think they should be the ones tutoring me. and besides, three wrongs dont make a right. on top of that, how do u tutor people for bio?? its gonna be more like a discussion. which suits me fine. =p and anyway, the holidays have stimulated my laze glands to secrete slacker glycerate, so i honestly, i dont really feel like going out to do work. hey! no offence, bobs =p blame it on the glands. haha i dont think we'd get any work done at meetings anyway, so i dont mind meeting you all. haha. so tell me when ure free/in the mood okie? oh heck..i dont think ure even reading this!!

ive watched harry potter!! it was cool =) i forgot the storyline anyway, so i cant really compare between the book and the movie. what i did pick up is the cedric diggory looks totally hot! haha. OH and i also made another fascinating discovery besides the jiajun incident. lord voldemort said "13 years it's been" and he pronounced the "been" like how it should be, with the double-e sound. and not how WE usually say it, like how have you BIN. welllllll, what can i say? some remnants of the Miss Ow instinct kicked in at that point. haha.

did i tell you about when i saw miss ow and her boyfriend? and she totally DAOED me! i mean, that was definitely a dao of the highest calibre. she SO did not acknowledge me =p mingfen said the same thing happened to emily. IS IT TRUE, EMILY? you KNOW, we can always get back at her..... *evil laughter* haha.

i HATE trying on clothes. for some obscure reason which even einstein will not be able to fathom, i look DIGUSTING in everything i try on. i mean, REALLY. and i seriously doubt its due to the defective mirrors. like, hey, this top looks pretty cool when displayed on a hanger, perhaps it would look nice on me too. i shall proceed to the fitting room to try it on, and thereafter stare wide-eyed in awe and admiration of my own reflection (NOT). and then i realise that "blown away" is right. but to put it more aptly, blown away with horror and repugnance. haha. and thats why i hate trying stuff on. please dont tag about this.

i cant stay at home the whole day! i'll starve of boredom and die a terrible death. a death so tragic, shakespeare would have paid me a fortune to write a play about it. i NEED fresh air. i suppose i could open the window and sit precariously on the ledge while inhaling large amounts of fresh, unpolluted (yeah right) 11th-floor-air. but that will only serve to tillilate the scent receptors in my nose and leave me begging for more. the cruel, deceptive promise of pure oxygen.

there's chocolate cake in the fridge, in the form of a sara lee pound cake. but everytime the thought of relishing a slice so much as strays across my barren mind, the picture of a fitting room immediately takes its place. haha. mental games-the leading, agonising cause of insanity in easily influenced individuals.

hey! did u read the sunday papers? the article about the apec summit in korea? how cute is THAT! the caption says that the male leaders were given a choice of brown, gold, green or blue traditional korean uhh costumes and that the females had to choose between pink and purple. haha! i find it extremely amusing. guess what, gloria arroyo chose the pink one. haha. what impeccable taste!

2005-11-16T01:09:00.000-08:00

HEYYYYYYYYY i finished functions tutorial today! WoOhOo!!! *does the happy dance while holding pom poms* F to the U to the N to the C to the T to the I, O, N, S! *cartwheels to the moon* wonder if i can still do a cartwheel!

you know, barney IS cool. everyone who agrees, dont tag. i watched him on tv today, and he was juggling! now, that is one talented purple dinosaur =p i remember kelvin soh used to juggle stuff in class! hahaha. pimple update: they are still there! ='( maybe i should spray some mortein into my face. it kills flies, so it should kill pimples too! worth a shot =p ooh ooh calfornia is on radio now. =D i miss O.C, dont you?

has anyone noticed that the fringey trend, the cover-your-forehead kind is out? haha i know its been out for quite a while now, about a few months i think, but i never really got to writing it down =p it was like a total in thing last year, but now its not so highly sought after. haha. i think side-swept long fringe is having its turn at the limelight. so everyone should look like miss ow! haha i cant remember her having any other kind of hairstyle.

we're gonna do service learning tml! at gravehaven. then..class outing! =p i wonder what itll be like. i hope the kids are at least manageable. as in, i hope they dont turn out to be some kind of little monsters you just want to slap and strangle and whip simultaneously. haha. oh NO what if they make fun of my pimpleS and pluck them out and throw them at me? or worse still, force-feed me with em, complete with pus oozing deliciously out. haha. this is gross. IM gross. must be barney's fault!! all that propoganda about using your imagination! why, the sneaky little dinosaur.

a smile does go a long way! saw candy and chiew ching in school yesterday and waved at them and then i saw dong hong riding his bike, on the way home and he waved at me. well, I was on the way home and HE was on the way out. haha. yeah anyway, its nice to be acknowledged and smiled at. =p i never really said hi and stuff to him before this year, even though we've been living in the same block since god knows when AND went to the same math tuition. =p

oh maaaan got this headache thing going on. its like driving a stake into my head and sawing ferociously to get it open. amanda said i looked like i was positively roasting, after the kite-flying thing at pre u se =p i thought it was cute. like a chicken on those rotating skewers or whatever, being cooked by heat transmitted by radiation. haha. imagine me, piping hot from the oven, baked to a crisp golden brown, ready to be served. tee hee.

hey joan! we have a new cheer for fioni! it goes like this: (to the rhythm of winnie lulu spastic pooh or north south east west)

FIONI! *clap clap clap clap*
BALONEY! *clap clap clap clap*
LEE! *clap clap clap clap*
PEE PEE! *clap clap clap clap*

haha winnie the alex pooh, ure no longer the subject of our cheers! :p

ooh justice league is at 530. half an hour more, must find something to entertain myself with for now!

2005-11-14T01:38:00.000-08:00

yipee!! ive just finished numerical methods!! its not so bad after all =p i thought i would hate it at first, what with all those graphs and stuff, but HEY! its sorta okay-ish i guess. tee-hee. i feel a great sense of satisfaction. wanna get all my homework as quickly as possible so that i can enjoy the remainder of the holidays in bliss. 15 minutes more to spongebob!! =D awww we're not going out tml anymore *pouts* got fioni baloney's message last night. haha..ill check if huilin they all are free tml. =)

anyway, today isnt just about good news and overwhelming senses of satisfaction. woke up to an innocent morning only to realise that TO MY HORROR, a new pimple had appeared! and now the 3 of them have formed a row on my forehead =( childhood chums, i bet. WELL now there are 5 pimply lumps on my poor poor forehead, and forming only 2 separate congregations. can u imagine how big and red and glaring one congregtion must look like? yeah well, thats my face, folks. haha.

whats more, my skin is starting to peel quite horribly these days. its really dry and flaky now and pretty soon, every inch of skin on my face will flake off and i will have no face left. =O AHHHH i have to go to school tml! and the Pimple Congregation still refuses to budge! 3 of them in a row! is this a bad omen? haha. timecheck: 5 minutes to spongebob =D watched sesame street just now, its such a feelgood show!

elmo: hey everyone! gather round! i have something to tell you guys! (or somewhere along these lines)
everyone: what is it, elmo?
elmo: i just wanted to say that i love you guys and i love sesame street
everyone: awwwwww we love you too, elmo

moral of story: Do not hesitate to express your love and appreciation to everyone you love and appreciate.

pretty sweet, huh? heehee. now why cant the world take a leaf from elmo's book?

oh and then they all started singing this happy, feelgood song like one big happy family. =p i think i teared at one point. hahaha..watched gilmore girls yesterday and i was tearing like a loon cuz the mother and her boyfriend luke broke up. bloody lachrymal glands.

oh!! i had this dream yesterday! and he was in it. hahaha.. i think i was still in 4E1 or something, but the weird (and sad) thing was he talked to everyone BUT me. haha..oh well. i cant remember who else was in the dream. =p

saw emily on saturday =D

ONE MINUTE TO SPONGEBOB!! must go now, sponges wait for no man.

2005-11-11T08:20:00.000-08:00

what!!! i just got the email from TYY and she says i cant wear t shirts, polo tees and jeans to the work attachment thingy. GREAT! what am i supposed to wear then?! i dont own officewear or stuff like that! and she reminded me for the SECOND time to dress decently and she explicitly said not to wear 'skimpily'. PUH-LEEZ!! im not some slut!! sorry, no offence to those of you who dress skimpily. i hope she doesnt go aruond reading blogs. haha. aiya simplest is wear sch u. =p i HOPE its an ENJOYABLE experience to make up for the absence at the chalet. HMMPH. cannot go wild wild wet with them. BLOODY HELL.

went to celebrate huilin's birthday today!! haha went to the bay by the espplanade to cut cake and stuff =D sorta reminded me of the time i went there with him.. it was cool, i played the sadistic scissors paper stone game with them so now my left hand is battered beyond recognition =p surprisingly, minyi hits really softly!! heehee =p no, of COURSE its not because she's a weakling! its cuz she's too compassionate and tender-hearted to bear hurting me. huilin on the other hand sees no reason to spare my hand from the stinging pain. i didnt spare anyone's either. HAH! =p anyway, there are like bruises now. all the burst blood vessels are having a party! its not as bad as the last time in sec 3 though! i counted 20 mini bruises on my left hand alone =D i mean, cool or COOOOOOL. haha..these seemingly sadistic games are usually the most fun =p im totally immune to it now! ha ha minyi!! ive since learnt to keep a straight face even though the impact may stimulate every single pain receptor underneath the skin of my left hand. EMBRACE the pain, welcome it with open arms so that it becomes more bearable. *sagely* its all in the mind, you see.

went for some communication skills workshop this morning. dont you just hate it when the speaker starts talking endlessly about his credentials?? i mean, OKAY i get it, ure really good at what you do, uve won many accolades, u receive a five figure salary a month, and ur life is a bed of roses fullstop. but is it REALLY necessary to go on and on about it?! everything should be taken in moderation, including others' self praise. i liked his workshop though! its so true you know..intelligence cant be measured solely by the grades you get and that kind of crap, but how effectively you can connect with people and communicate with them.

yet another solemn entry. happy birthday huilin!! =D i hope you like your present =) even though i know ure not reading this!! heehee..

2005-11-07T21:36:00.001-08:00

i..dont know what to say anymore. i mean, how unlucky can one person get? first, she tells me the attachment will only last 2 weeks. do you know how happy i was at that point? cuz according to my calculations, if it started on the 21st, it'll end on the 2nd, which means i can go to the chalet on the 5th. well, ha-ha. what a joke. after that she told me that because of dunno which stupid ass, they're now postponing it to start on the 24th and itll end on the 7th which is the same day the chalet ends. what a rosy picture. and in front of TYY i had to fake it and act like everything was peachy. have you ever witnessed such perfect timing? theres bad luck and then theres BAD LUCK. this is undoubtedly a case of the latter.

i was so fricking pissed today but there was OP rehearsal with my PW mateys so i couldnt very well sulk and look glum when everyone came back to school specially for this. and to think i have to plaster on a fake smile and pretend to be happy tml during the real OP. it is a not a pretty feeling realising how down on your luck you are when the OP exam is tml. i mean, come ON. what did i do? break a mirror in my sleep? unknowingly walk under a ladder? cross paths with a black cat at midnight or whatever? stepped on a four-leaf clover? sheesh. i cant believe it. and its not as if buona vista is a stones throw away from pasir ris either. for gods sake, its like an hour away. its right at the other end of the stupid east west line. try 10 million stones.

ever watched a series of unfortunate events? well, if the boudelaires think THEY'RE unlucky, wait till they hear my story.

she asked meAGAIN if i was still ups et over my promo results. !! i didnt know what to say so i said uhhhh okay lah. i think she took it to mean that i wasnt. honestly,i was okay with it until she asked me that day. as in, maybe she's expecting me to get better or whatever. to hell with expectations. i can NEVER live up to them so people like my mother should just stop setting them.

zhiliang is very practical.

im playing the xi shua shua song again but even THAT proves futile in changing the mood. thank you huishan for trying to cheer me up. ure right, of course its not the end of the world. but i guess im not one to live and let live easily. i wish i had a garden so i could grow some four leaf clover plants and carry a fresh one in my pocket everyday. haha. im trying to think of at least one good thing which has happened to me recently.

oh and i think this means i have to give the clay target shooting course a miss too. isnt this wonderful? practically everything is happening simultaneously! i have never had a better holiday!! woo-hoo. its on the 30th. i dont want to miss it! i shall ask to be excused. SHIT why the hell cant everything be spread out nicely instead of happening at the same time and putting me in situations like this.

and why cant i have one of those clocks hermione has to turn back time?! i think hey arnold is on now. i bet HE'S having a great holiday. HMMPHHHHHHHH. any effort made to cheer me up shall not be entertained.

2005-11-07T06:49:00.000-08:00

I KILLED A FLY!!!!!!!!

i couldnt help it! it was an accident, i swear. the accursed insect flew in the window, landed right smack on the table and was practically challenging me to a duel. so i accepted its challenge graciously and won. HAH! that'll teach the rest of the Fly Clan to mess around with me. oh, but again, i must stess this. i didnt mean to KILL it in coldblood. i actually wanted to scare it away with a touch of my highlighter, but who expected the highlighter to drop on it =p so thats the story of the squashed fly and its repentant murderer. i say, be glad it wasnt a highlighter with spikes.

oh shit oh shit oh shit. THANK YOU WINNIE for reminding me about bloody I and R. i keep getting fricking AE for it, i dont see how im going to do well for it. stupid damned 'guidelines' paper! its all a bunch of crap! which somebody drew up to mislead people like me. after i wrote the second draft she said dont write about group dynamics. im like, oh for GODS SAKE. its supposed to be my bloody INSIGHTS AND REFLECTIONS, its title being self explanatory. why cant i reflect on the way my group members work in a group?! INSTEAD we're writing about stupid STRENGTHS AND LIMITATIONS of our project, which seems suspiciously like a mere regurgitation of EOM. I and R my foot. they should consider renaming it EOM 2.

i was on a tv marathon today!! since i am so greatly disliked by many and nobody wanted to go out with me today, i had no other companion aside from the trusty tv set to accompany me in my solitude and loneliness. haha. uhhhhh i hope that the former is not true. =p anyway. i watched lotsa shows, the more embarrassing ones include sesame street and hi five. haha..seriously, sesame street gets me all hyped up and happy! and makes me feel like a kid again and makes me want to count along to their childish learn-your-numbers games. x men and ghostbusters are fun =p

i sent an sms dedication to young on say it with music just now but he didnt play my song =( WELL. im going to get even with him after completing this! gonna mug him. haha.

msged aaron to ask how olevels were, and he was like, ure talking to me?! omg, is the sky falling? i asked him if he was chicken little in disguise. haha..i admit, i am a very very slow replyer, so sometimes i forget to reply him and then we dont talk for a very very very very long time. haha.

just did my i and r. im SO annoyed with it. once the OP is over, i shall print out a fresh copy of it and set it ablaze, and watch the flames devour it savagely, rip it ruthlessly into microscopic smithereens for which there will be no use, and stand as spectator, relishing every sadistic moment of it. good riddance to i and r! despite all this, i really really really hope i dont like, fail it or anything. haha. thanks a million hui shan for sending me yours as reference =p you shall be rewarded hansomely one day! haha. i first heard of the term 'rewarded hansomely' in the story of king midas. is it that story? the one where everything he touches turns to gold? yeah, that =p

gotta go to school tml for OP practice with my PW mates. dreaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad. i dont feel like wearing school uni during the holis.

2005-11-04T07:37:00.000-08:00

hello, my beloved and loyal readers =p

stupid I and R! it deserves to DIE! and DIE it shall. ill rip its guts out! tear its fibres apart! reduce it to a pathetic heap of shredded paper. i hate I and R! i hate anything we have to do individually, actually. haha. oh, damned nails. joan, how can you stand scratching everything you touch? it gives me the shudders. =p like, right now, im trying to type and my nails just keep scraping against the keys, which hinders the efficiency of my typing. haha.

*cries* OH THAI MUN!! she's such a gem! =D she called me when i was sleeping today! haha. but thats not the reason for her gemliness, of course. she went to heeren and bought the clippety clips for me! 10 for $2.90 too! what a bargain. haha..she asked if i wanted the neon ones or the pastel kind, and i said very loudly and convincingly, I TRUST YOU, THAI MUN, YOU LITTLE GEMMITY GEM! THE FATE OF MY HAIR LIES IN YOUR HANDS ALONE! YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE THE WAY I LOOK! and moved by my very loud, very convincing speech, she decided that the pastel ones were more appealing. well, thats true. i wouldnt want too much attention drawn to my hair. me and Hair have been at loggerheads with each other of late. i dont like the way it looks and it doesnt like me either. mutual hatred. i really dont like it you know. just LOOK at it! acting all smug and thinking it looks so damned good when it doesnt. how DARE it grow on my head! such audacity! the safest thing is to just let it grow of course. i bet id look worse if i cut it. haha. but long hair is so typical and like, everyone has long hair and stuff. on the other hand...*dances* i have hair clippety clips now!! (clippety clips and gemmity gems. justin, i know ure reading this and its all your fault im speaking like this now!! you and your beddity bed. hahaha.)

cheeyao sent this totally adorable song called xi shua shua =p it is so cute! and it makes me happy just listening to it! haha happy melody, happy words. i think i listened to it 7 times straight after he sent it to me =p and now im grooooovin to it again =p I THINK HE SPIKED THE SONG. i get so hiiiigh listening to it =p heeeheeee. *giggles* actually..it sounds like some hokkien/thai song!! oh did anyone watch table for 3 yesterday? one of the guests was joshua ang from.. the various jack neo movies. haha.. you know, the good looking one. and he really IS good looking, especially now that hes older and stuff. haha..XI SHUA SHUA XI SHUA SHUA XI SHUA SHUA OOH OOH! file transfer, anyone? i take it upon myself to spread the love for xi shua shua =p it should be our school song! heehee then ill get high every wednesday morning.

oh shit, can someone teach me how to play music on my blog? for gods sake, i was supposed to change template immediately after promos ended =p

ARGH. haha. i feel sad. =( i think i wont be able to go to the e1 chalet afetr all.. =( why oh WHYYYYYYY..i have this work attachment thingy starting on the 21 Nov and i highly doubt that itll last for just a week. im seeped in immense sorrow now, awashed with grief, engulfed in disappointment. im a magnet for misfortune. everyone will be having fun without me. and NOBODY WILL MISS ME ='( quick, someone convince me that im better off not going before i sink into depression and have to call the hotline. haha have you seen those depression advertisements lately? i must take down the number, in preparation for a rainy day.

DID YOU KNOW that some people are immune to the HIV virus?

2005-10-23T08:40:00.000-07:00

It was difficult sourcing for literature review for our written report, as the idea of a pre-ordering system is a relatively new one and there are few articles, let alone books, written on it. Aside from the information we obtained from certain websites, we had virtually no other form of literature review.

Our written report was well balanced as we considered its pros and cons from various perspectives, such as from students’ and canteen vendors’ points of view. Through the numerous surveys and interviews we conducted with the different groups of people, we were able to get a relatively fair reflection of how the people in the school viewed the implementation of the system.

As an alternative approach, we could have interviewed other schools which have implemented pre-ordering systems that work on a slightly similar concept as ours, to obtain an even clearer view of the system.

Working on the GPP was the most time-consuming and mind-wrecking period of project work, as we had to think of an entirely new idea, complete with details, to work on. We had to decide on the information we wanted to obtain and subsequently come up with surveys to distribute to our target group. It was also hard deciding on the number of people to survey in order to get a fair representation of the general opinions of all the students.

Our brainstorming techniques included jotting all the ideas that the group members brought up during discussions, whether they seemed useful or not. This ensured that all suggestions were included and we were able to sieve out all the useful ideas to be included in our project.

The difficult part about preparing for the OP presentation was allocating appropriate parts to the various members. We found out that sometimes, parts of our speeches would overlap with another member’s, and we had to decide which to exclude. Also, we had a hard time structuring our presentation and deciding which points should go first, for example, whether our research or modifications should be presented first.
Our OP slides are easily understandable as we only included the main points in the slides. The slides look neat and uncluttered and are easy on the eyes. This will ensure that the audience is paying attention to the content of our speeches and not merely the slides.

Throughout the preparation of the project, the members were cooperative and were open to suggestions during discussions. The appointed leader of the group made sure that all discussions were productive and beneficial to the progress of the project. For each discussion, we listed the targets we wanted to achieve that day and completed them so that everything went according to plan.

Through the preparation stages, I have learnt that there is always a way to tackle a problem, especially when brainstorming for ideas to overcome the limitations our project faced. I have also learnt of the need for open communication, as only then can group members express their ideas to others effectively. It is important to be tactful and sensitive when rejecting someone’s idea as disagreements between members can result in unproductive group discussions. As members often had conflicting views, it is necessary that each is given the opportunity to validate his view so that others may see the logic in it, and hence preventing conflict.

i love my blog i love my blog muack muack muack! it is SO handy and SO useful! i love you bloggy. haha..

2005-10-21T09:24:00.000-07:00

i look stupid in photos.

right now, im sprinkled with a dash of sadness, some traces of disappointment and a generous dose of exasperation.

i went out with the air rifle people today, to pizza hut to eat..pizzas. haha. cheese crust could possibly be one of the greatest innovations of pizza hut. cheese crust rocks. i eat the crust last, of course, given its smooth, mozarella interior. a heavenly form of indulgence indeed. my grades are quite mediocre i guess. i mean..they're not exceptionally good and yet they're not disastrous either. or maybe i shouldnt expect any Armadillos because after all, i probably dont have an Armadillo-worthy standard. its all Bob the Builder for me this time. not a single Armadillo in sight. haha. i should wake up and accept the fact that perhaps Armadillos werent meant for my taking, and that Bob the Builders can be considered quite a jaw-dropping feat already. oh no..what if it was all a fluke? maybe i just got lucky and poof, i got Bob the Builders. what if actually i cant even get Bobs?? okay admittedly, i did improve for all the subjects except econ. but maybe that has somethign to do with the way they calculated the marks during mid yrs and now. i failed my gp essay too..wrote about inner beauty which apparently shouldnt be something that is discussed in the essay. failed by half a mark lah..haha..thank goodness my compre pulled me up totally. oh maybe that was a fluke too. everything is a fluke. haha.

theres PW tml. we're gonna do our OP slides. ive just typed out my speech. oh and she played back the video of our individual speeches and honestly, i thought my presentation sucked!! i kept looking at the cue cards and i think i kept smiling. haha..looking at people looking at me makes me feel shy and one way in which this shyness is expressed is through the constant upturned frown on my face. =p

oh did i meantion already..cheese crust is cool. and the air rifle outing was really fun. =) and OH MY GOD i love lime, they put franz ferdinand on the poster!!! yippee. the only bad thing is..there isnt anymore space on my wall to accomodate an extra poster.

2005-10-14T03:51:00.000-07:00

haha! just got back from air rifle. today wasnt so bad, at least, it was WAY better than wednesday, when my shots were so hideous i cant even bear to look at them. i mean, how can you not think about other stuff when ure aiming at the black dot??!! im constantly attacked by thoughts, ruthlessly, mercilessly every single time i look into the aiming picture thingy. today's was kinda nice though =p heehee. well, out of the 3, ONE of them was really nice. i hate it when i have bad shooting days. it just totally sucks when you have like, stray shots and then you go like, shhhhhhhhhit after pulling the trigger and then you SO know that its gonna ruin the entire overall grouping.

just went to visit zl's blog today!! haha. and i wanna thank him a whole lot for putting up that tagboard for me!! =D didnt wanna bother ivan, who's been doing it for me for the last two times, AGAIN. there was the J2 farewell assembly today, and it was really sad..reminded me of sec 4 days. im relieved they didnt play 'graduation', cuz that would have made it even worse. of course, the level of sadness cant hold a candle to the farewell ceremony at pre u sem! i mean, that was waaay over the top. the sad, miserable, atmosphere, the crying..we were like floating logs in a sea of depression. and they had this guy to play sad piano music in the background! like, LIVE sad music. that just made the entire situation so solemn and sorrowful. and i rememebr the emcee, apple, giving a recap of the week's activities and not to mention, pouring his woes into the cups of our hearts.

open house is tml! and we have to go to school dark and early, when half the world is still snoring their guts out, to prepare the booth. heh..made posters today! and i actually had fun making the poster yesterday! i used crayons, my second favourite medium, the first being markers. =p then i sprayed it with hair spray, cuz some teacher said in sec school that it would prevent the crayon-ed pictures from smudging. what i DONT like about hair spray is how suffocating its fumes can be. haha. not that i spray it into my face and inhale deeply.

OMG we're gonna get back econs and math on monday..this is all very worrying. i mean, MATH!! exactly how well can i do for MATH?!! answer: not very. am i destined to be a math dunce for life?? and you wonder why my email addy is as such. and its not like im very confident of econs and gp either. everything is so worrying!! i bet i have newly developed wrinkles every day, all accumulating on my forehead. do i look old?

i so feel like cutting my hair. maybe i should just cut it myself! haha. i cut my own fringe in primary 2 once, and i even remember which pair of scissors i used, possibly because the outcome of that one fringecut turned out to be so grotesque, the incident is etched in my memory for all eternity.

2005-10-13T02:05:00.000-07:00

oh NOOOOOO i ate 2 packs of gummies while on the phone with zl. do you know how much sugar a single seemingly harmless piece of gummy contains?? and do you know how many gummies 2packets contain? DO YOU???? oh, did you also know what gummies are called in chinese? 'xiang pi tang', i.e. rubber candy. haha..oh and do you know what else you dont know? i failed chinese badly!! first time i failed chinese. sighhhh. my mother tongue, my culture, my ROOTS!!! i am a tongueless, cultureless, rootless girl!!with a chinese standard too low to even imagine. my chinese cant survive without the aid of tuition. it is in utterly dire straits when left to its own devices. i cant even pass it for gods sake!! i SO dont want to take chinese next year. please, talk to me in hua yu from now on.

oh oh oh i opened the campbell soup tin myself and cooked it MYSELF today. haha!!! how's that for not being independent? =D and what's that you say? opening canned soup with one of today's highly efficient and energy-conserving can openers doesnt make me a responsible, independent girl of the new millenium? well, IN YOUR FACE! haha. *sings merrily* im so capable, im SO capable.

aw shucks. it suddenly hit me that im supposed to draw this poster for air rifle for open house. groaaaan. i just watched hey arnold and as told by ginger. hahah. who doesnt love cartoons? =D oh we had this character profiling thing today in school for the character development programme thingy and guess what!! im a...MELON!! here's what it says:

the sweetheart of all personality types is the golden retriever (melons)- calm, dependable, good natured, and easy to get along with. they are our peace-loving diplomats. they are faithful friends, good listeners and stable. because they dislike any kind of confrontation, they will compromise to keep the peace what whatever costl they can be passive, unenthusiastic, and at times very stubborn. since golden retrievers hate change, their motto is 'lets keep things the way they are'.

golden retrievers make excellent counselors, diplomats, and elementary educators. at home, they love to putter around the house. working wll under pressure, they handle school adequately, but not beyond what is required.

their philosphy is to be cautious. they are thoughtful people who like to consider all possible angles and implications before making a move. they prefer to take a back seat in meetings and discussions. they enjoy observing other people in action. they listen to others and get the drift of the discussions before making their own points. they tend to adopt a low profile and have a slight distant, unruffled air around them.

im not enthusiastic!!!!!! and i dont agree with the part where we like to putter around the house. haha. it also says we think a lot, and that sometimes we think too much. well, that much is true. haha. think think think. one thought just leads to another and sooner than you realise, you have a whole host of scenarios. SOMETIMES i wish i didnt think so much either. i guess for the most part the thing was accurate, but certain parts are just SO not me. im a half melon-half grape. =p

oh noooo im starting to feel a slight discomfort at the stomach-area. i think the gummies are attacking me from the inside. sawing/gnawing/slicing away at the walls of my stomach relentlessly, determined to see daylight again. and let me assure you, 2 packets of gummies can certainly get the job done fast.

im sorry, but im trying to put up the tag board now!! haha..i hope its up by the time you read this, so that you know..you can post stuff to me!! hint hint. heehee. i SO need to bathe. i bathed about 4 hours ago. oh shit. i hope my gp marks arent gonna be like chinese.. =( and i dont think ill get any A AT ALLthis time..sighhh.

2005-10-10T06:56:00.000-07:00

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD i saw joshua today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! in cine! with his friend! at the food court! as in, we were taking the up-escalators and then i saw this guy who looked oddly like him, complete with wrist band and TJ friend and all, and so i thought, oh what the heck, just wave lah. so i waved and he waved back! it was him!! haha!! coooool. i msged him later to confirm that i didnt wave to a complete stranger =p so exciting! *screams* haha. its been so long since i last saw him..well, only a few months, but still. okay..ill post again later =p t

2005-10-02T03:08:00.000-07:00

just studied bio and i am just SO tired. like, brain-tired. not like, sleepy-tired. sapped of energy, drained of stamina, rid of enthusiasm. not a sliver of determination, not a thread of cheeriness remaining in me. that about sums up the state im in right now. haha. so exaggerated.

my brain has reached saturation point. all my neurones are saturated with information packets and any extra information packet has to wait for a free neurone before an information-neurone complex can be formed, hence increasing the rate of information uptake. i should also add cholesterol to my brain to reduce any uncontrolled leakage of information ions.

haha..i was reading about inbreeding yesterday and i msged joan to tell her how gross i thought it was, being forced to mate with your sibling. i mean, the poor cows cant choose who they want their cattle to be fathered by. is that the price you pay for having acquired desirable characteristics? haha. oh and i was reading about how sex hormones are made from cholesterol. so does that mean that fatter people have more sex hormones? joan said she sometimes goes to the fridge, opens it, looks around, shuts it again and continues studying! i was surprised! i thought only i did silly things like that =p haha.

i also go the kitchen, look out the window, wash my hands and then go back to my work. it doesnt make sense, i know. i mean, explore the fridge when ure not hungry, wash ur hands when there isnt an ounce of bacteria on them (well, almost) and looking out the window when all u see is zhonghua. haha.

oh gosh i feel totally queasy now..i think it must be all that reading! maybe my adrenal glands are secreting an overload of adrenaline into my..gut or whatever. so i decided to blog =p blogging helps to relieve stress and hopefully, improve my gp. haha. oh my god gp..what if i cant do all 12 questions!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my content sucks. i feel like this ignorant frog in the well. this stupid frog phrase is getting so cliched. i keep using it. haha.

cheeyao just called me lame. =( haha..i hate it when perfect 10 tantalises you with the prospect of enjoying your favourite song and then they cut it off halfway. they always do that! what the hell is their problem!! ahhhhh!!!!!!! the queasiness is making my tummy squirm. like a worm. with germs. with his hair in a perm.

i have suddenly been struck unconscious with the boulder of reality. tomorrow is GP and bio. and im contemplating how to study for econs and math on tuesday, when by the time i reach home, its gonna be 4pm. luckily its only essay for econs. i mean, not that essays are a piece of cake. but can u imagine if it were paper 1 and 2 instead??? i think i would rather step in front of a moving vehicle. haha. my poor poor brain. i must eat fish tonight! its supposedly brain food, isnt it? anything to help my brain grow big and strong and healthy and muscular! and protrude freakily out of my head!

by the way, if u think this colour sucks, we have something in common.

2005-09-30T09:39:00.000-07:00

i think he's in love. but anyway..it's really none of my business, is it..i just wish i didnt feel so queasy bloody hell. haha.

ANYWAY. its friday, 1250am. but i suppose the heading's already served its puporse in telling you that. haha..its EXAMS next week!! hope all our exams are in the hall! =p with air con..haha..oh my god have you read wednesday's papers? they made that girl blogger remove all those remarks she made about her teacher from her blog! and oh please she just called her a spinster who had something against attractive girls or whatever. haha. so it isnt nice to hear stuff like that about you on your student's blog, but STILL! you cant make everyone like you. and BESIDES, its her damned BLOG!! are they gonna censor what she can and cant write it in as well? its stupid. if i were impulsive enough, i'd write a sample 'defamation entry' and see what happens to me.

haha..have i ever writtten anything bad about anyone? i think i have..have i? haha..i dont know. oh you know what? i think she doesnt like me. i mean, its not like she explicitly told me or anything, but things like this, you can just tell. liying was poking at my hipbone in the audi after bio yesterday. haha. was it bio? i forgot. you have just witnessed the effects of short term memory.

i think my tone feels different today. it gives this entry an entirely different atmosphere from the previous lalala entries. i feel so..calm today. you could tell me all my lecture notes have gone missing or all my tutorials had mysteriously landed themselves in an inescapable inferno and i'd probably smile and say, 'these things happen.' i wish the first paper on monday were bio instead of gp!! what if i get my skills (if any at all) mixed up and write an intro, body and conclusion for my bio essay? haha. or worse still, i summarise the main points for bio and end up submitting one-liners for 10 marks.

oh cooooool franz ferdinand in blasting my room down. FF rocks, yes? i wish that queasy feeling would go away and leave me alone! it is not a pleasant experience trying to type a blog entry while your stomach is doing cartwheels and backflips. i rememebr doing cartwheels in primary school =D phyllis taught me in primary 3..haha..phyllis. wonder she is now!

oh my GOD i just realised that day, weikang is in AJ too..haha!! in class 19. im dying to ask if he recognises me! he's in my CDP group too. our group only has 3 guys, including bobby and the 2 guys from 19. thats really..unfortunate on the guys' part =p i mean, -I- feel bad for them.. hahaha.. not that we're cold, unfriendly beasts of course. we always welcome a nice guy. =p that just sounds wrong.

i was on the same bus as terence and jian hao (i hope thats his name! =p) yesterday on the way home, and i was planning on tapping JH's shoulder to say bye, cuz i was sitting between him and the back door, and i figured he didnt have extra eyes fixed to the back of his head to see me alighting. and to my surprise, he actually turned back to wave first! haha. that was nice,at least i didnt have to wobble precariously over to the front and risk falling flat on my face and subjecting myself and generations after me to an eternity of ridicule. oh, what am i saying..my balance isnt non existent. haha..mr chua is funny. he asked me why im still online at this ungodly, unearthly hour when i should be asleep and ready for 'war' =p haha..imagine going into the exam hall in full battle gear, complete with shield, spear and for the modern warrior, pepper spray. haha. someone on the radio just smsed and said one of her irrational fears was if the toilet bowl collapsed when she was sitting on it. irrational, indeed. puh LEEZ. i reckon she can pick herself off the ground and go pee at another.

2005-09-24T04:26:00.000-07:00

oh moaaaaan. exams are coming in a week's time, and my math is in dire straits. i hope i will be hit by sparks of brilliance, sparkly enough to pull me through the exams. haha..oh THE MAGNETS came yesterday!! they're this acapella group and in case u havent heard of them, they're in yesterday's (friday's) newpaper. they came to sing during mass civics! it was SO cool!! their vocals are strong, the beatboxing was FANTASTIC, and they complemented one another really well. AND they've sung for the queen!! everyone was gushing over the beatboxer guy..haha..ting ting, liying, joan and me went to take a photo with the bassist!! he was totally friendly and when i asked him if we could take a photo, he said, yes you can! cool huh! joan wanted to take a photo with andy frost, mr cool-hair-goodlooking dude-beatboxes-till-he-runs-out-of-saliva. but he was surrounded by so many people! and we were already half an hour late for chinese class. haha..we figured the teacher would understand. and she did! she just went 'ni men qu na autograph ah?' and i told her 'wo men qu pai zhao!' haha..there werent muffins, so me and joan couldnt uphold the tradition of bringing brown bags containing food to class. haha..the cafe in class rocks! the only thing which doesnt rock is its location =p technically, it IS sandwiched between both toilets. haha..but that hasnt stopped business from soaring. the muffins are always sold out!! even though they're so oiley..haha..but they're like Ideal Muffins. crisp on the outside and warm and soft on the inside. =D

DARN! no time to paragraph!! gotta go have dinner now. =p byebye!! and ill blog soon! like, after promos =p like, 3rd october. haha..

2005-09-16T09:52:00.000-07:00

oh my god, they're molluscs, arent they?

2005-09-16T09:15:00.000-07:00

AHHHHH!!! how dumb i have been all this while not to notice that the colour tools were HERE!! thank you, joan, for curing me of my cock-eyeness. haha. we did the chem quiz together in the library so that 2 brains can work at the same time, so that we can get full marks for it. haha! well, THEY gave us the second chance =p although i must say, i really need those few precious bonus marks. i think im going to cry. my stupid timetable sucks..

what the stupid timetable says:

day 1- gp (3 hours, for crying out loud) and then bio
day 2- math and econ essay
day 3- chem and chinese
day EIGHT (yes, after FOUR days of break)- econ paper 1 and 2.

THREE horrendous days of double papers..what is the world coming to?? what was the timetable committee or whoever is the mastermind behind this genius timetable thinking??!! im so glad for this fonted, coloured new entry =p ooh, we went to causeway point for something today. haha..i hope i dont reveal anything. oh what the hell. i am SO not in the mood to type today. my fingers have acquired lives of their own, brains of their own, they are no longer controlled by the brain in my head, which is currently facing the threat of shutting down before exams.

i think i shall publish this now. its 1250am, but im not sleepy. pastamania is nice when ure hungry. haha..thaimun's carbonera kept getting attacked by us. i think the white wine one is nice! i ate carbonera once i think, or another one of those impossibly creamy ones and i got sick after half had been eaten. haha. its nice on the initial few bites, but not for a whole dish. i ate mussels and clams. i think big mussels look scary. i was examining it and thinking, THIS is a living thing?? maybe i should read up on the mode of life of a crustacean. is that what they're called? no, i think theres another name for it. but i forgot what it is. im typing aimlessly. im not even in the mood to be literary today. all simple english. all short sentences. like. this. one. well, technically theyre not even sentences, cuz there isnt like a subject and a verb or whatever. i WILL publish this NOW. *clicks publish post*

2005-09-09T03:27:00.000-07:00

gosh, what the jadedness of work can do an otherwise completely sane mind. haha..this morning, i was reading my chemmy notes and then i thought, hey! my pillowcase looks pretty crumpled! and so i took it upon myself to iron it, its fascinating how heat can remove creases. it made me think of alpha helices and hydrogen bonds and stuff..haha..it feels really weird talking to him now..i feel so distant from him. i feel like im talking to someone i just knew. its like, i dont know what to say to him. and he sounds i dunno, sianish most of the time. maybe he doesnt like talking to me or something..i dont know..i mean, he's probably happier talking with other people..i dont come online very often, so i dont see him very often either, but i just thought i'd say hello today. i think its like, the first time in a very very long time since ive talked to him online. and it lasted such a short time too, cuz he had to go. and its like, so much has happened and all that, that it has rendered me uncertain of what to say in his presence. sounds stupid right..i mean, i bet he doesnt even feel the same way..haha..okay..this isnt good..how come im still feeling like this after all this time? got to go..dinner's ready.

2005-09-08T03:22:00.000-07:00

=(
=(
=(

what do the above frowny faces suggest about my mood at present? yes, that of gloom, depression and crestfallen-ness/crestfallen-ism/crestfallen-tion. haha. somebody PLEASE teach me to deco my blog! joan taught me, but due to a slight micommunication, i received some anime song from her instead. haha..let me guess, is it something from inuyasha? its really funny when i offend her favourite characters. haha..i called the guy lord sushimaru yesterday and she was all, HOW CAN U SAY THAT?! haha..so funny. she also said she and my 'mom' would kill me. incidentally, my mom happens to be jessica and we are part of the stone family. haha. now, before you think, what is she, in playschool?? let me explain the origin of the Stone Family. =D

1. jessica likes to stone. she is an ardent fan of unproductive leisure activities such as you guessed it, Stoning. she is also a possible and likely contender for president and founder of the Stone Club. THEREFORE, we came to the conclusion that the most appropriate name for her would be.. Stone Girl =) short, simple and direct. what more could anyone ask for in a name?

2. jessica and bobby are usually together, probably having highly intellectual conversations about math or chem or bio which is so profound, noone else understands a word they're saying..haha..or about murthabhaks (which appears to be bobby's number one choice of food) OR anime (jessica and joan's preferred choice of conversation topic) OR a combination of both (bollywood anime?) haha. so then we called bobby Stone boy, as he complements Stone girl.

HEYYYYYYYY everyone in my contact list is either away or 'out to lunch' even though technically, its dinner time or busy or something. nobody will talk to me =( *gasp* maybe they all changed their status when i came online! haha..hmmmm..something quite unexpected happened today..i wonder if the piano tuner is coming tml,the middle C is loose and i cant play it! and many many many songs that i have have middle C in them. sometimes i really wanna continue lessons but then i think id probably be too lazy to do my theory homework and all that..and practising new songs, especially when i dont even like the melody! oh WELL guess i just have to be stuck at this low level, forever plagued by lack of competence and skill =(

oh my god, im so sorry ivan, i almost forgot your blog addy =p joan asked me yestedray for it, and i told her complete-insanity..haha..i knew there was a hyphen!! but anyway, i was close wasnt i?? complete, total. total, complete. heck, there's no difference!! hahaa..but not to worry, i rememebred it when i was bathing this morning and i have even tagged it! after an eternity of absence. haha..

i wish michael thurman were my personal friend!! haha..i mean, just look at all those bodies he's tranformed on extreme makeover!! he can perform miracles, that guy can. all that toning and healthy eating and what not. =p i vaguely rememebr having already expressed this in a past entry.

OH MY GOD i suddenly remember that im supposed to print out the written report!! oh my god oh my god, i hope i didnt accidentally delete something from fioni by mistake. haha..can u imagine if i didnt print out the WR? boy, i sure cant. i think my group members will take turns skinning a portion of me each.

2005-09-07T02:21:00.000-07:00

haha..i just did the bonus 5% chem quiz thing BUT I GOT 2 WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!! =( haha..DAMN!! i didnt go out to study today..i didnt feel like going out anyway. hey winnie the pooh bear came to meet us yesteray!! =D wonder if he has already figured out the mystery which surrounds Red Cloud Mountain. haha..=p in the end he thought we were playing a stupid trick on him and that RCM didnt really exist. what a thing to say, winnie! denying the existence of your loved one. haha. we have a new name for him too!! KANTANG BEAR!! haha..i forgot why though. its either cuz we were eating potato wedges or cuz he looked like a potato or cuz he had a potato brain or something.

i remember talking about mr potatohead to them. i had this email addy in p6, it was icecreamsoda@mr-potatohead.com. haha.. yeah, it was one of those pick your own domain name site thingies. they were really cooL! come to think of it, i remember all the email addys i used to have! the VERY FIRST one was peppermint_van@hotmail.com. *tears* oh, it brings back memories of my YZPS days. haha..then the potatohead one and then it was questionmark@white-star.com and then the next and current one was the isohatemath one =p cuz i REALLY REALLY hated math then. i got a disgusting B for it, how could i not hate it?

haha..i used to think hotmail was totally common and like, everyone had it, so it was kinda boring having the same thing as everyone else did. haha..mr potatohead was coooool =p and yesterday, four of us shared that one little cafe table!! the surface area of table per capita was..infinitesimal. then the cafe lady came over and asked us if we wanted a drink and "you understand that this is a cafe right?" and winnie was like, 'not thirsty'..haha..she practically forced us to buy the drink..haha..i mean, she might as well have robbed us of our wallets there and then.

anyway..got to eat fish and chips (which were acutally fat little wedges) yesterday!! i just LOVE the baby carrots!! =D and yesterday's supply of baby carrots really WERE baby. they were so tiny, they could fit through the gaps in my fork! i liked the crispy fish. all crunchy and tender and juicy and worth salivating over. if we had to have lunch in that library for a whole week, i'd go broke buying food. ivan spent $8 on 2 drinks! haha.

im quite proud of myself today! did 1 essay and a DRQ and studied bonding and energetics for the chem quiz. i actually wanted to blog yesterday but my conscience got the better of me and so i refrained from turning on the computer.

haha..my didi is so sweet! =) he still remembers me sometimes and sends a goodnight msg, but usually im already asleep. haha..i didnt get to see him that day when we went back for teachers day thingy! he said 4T1 was sitting at the front row, but i didnt notice him. and then he called and said he was going to PS too, cuz me and the other e1 girls were there, but i didnt see him in the end anyway.. haha.. sometimes i realise how me and my didi are so alike. we have the same birthday. plus, he's an only child too..and he lives nearby. if i cant have a real brother, an assumed one would do just fine =p tonight im going to study biomolecules! *tries to get herself all psyched about studying bio*

im thirsty.

this song is cool..

Because Of You

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way, to never let it get that far

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh
Every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with

Because of you
I'll never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I watched you die
I heard you cry
Every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry
In the middle of the night
For the same damn thing

Because of you
I'll never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I tried my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid

Because of you
Because of you

2005-09-03T09:42:00.000-07:00

OH GOD i just came back from tuition. it is completely inhumane, asking someone to sit through 3 and a freaking half hours on the same chair at the same table facing the same direction. i was positively DYING. i told justin that i was yawning so much, my mouth seemed set on assuming the o-shape for the rest of my life. it was time to go and yet he asked me to do another question and another and another!! i was SO pissed i had to bite my lip to calm myself down. if that makes any sense.

haha..anyway, it was FINALLY over and i was so happy and relieved, i got down on my knees to thank the stars and swear upon my life to sleep at least a full hour before going to tuition next time so that i will not have to shove toothpicks up my eyes to keep them open. okay, no, that was a fake scenario, but trust me, similar thoughts were running through my mind. before coming online, my mom told me not to go to chatlines. im like, mother, i do not go to chatlines (anymore). im not desperate for company. i have many friends, f.y.i. haha. i hope thats is true =p

oooh justin gave me the safety pin earring thingy!! thaaaaaank you justeeeen =D its on my left ear hole now. to be safe, i put it in the oldest ear hole, the one i pierced in k2 (thats like a million years ago! haha), in case the new ones got like, infected or something and then id have to subject them to euthanasia again. just how many holes ive pulled the plug on, i cant rememeber!! too many, sadly =(

haha..just talked to mr chua online! he says if i dream of an ionic question, i can msg him to ask =p hahaha..i will =) not dream of the ionic question, ASK. haha..i just promised him that i would dream of ionic bonding =p come to think of it, ive never had dreams about my studies before. OH BUT I HAVE!!!! the day beore PSLE results were released, i dreamt i got 122 =( boy, that was one hell of a nightmare. i mean, thats like a fail. anyway, im glad that wasnt a premonition. haha.

im taking a super long time to write this!! cuz i keep getting distracted by conversations and all. haha..fioni says im easily distracted. actually, huey eng says that too. hahaha. we were doing PW in the library today, and like, i dunno, its just interesting to notice what other people are doing you know? not out of keypohness, mind you. we wanted to eat fish and chips today again!! but who knew the queue would be so intimidatingly long, and BESIDES, they werent having offer, so we packed up to go to..KFC! where i ate a very tiny, very unfilling but very tasty shrooms burger =p i mean, it could fit into MY palm! i could squash it like a fly! too bad its so small and it finished so quickly. haha..good things come in small packages.

theres econ extra lesson on monday and its gonna be FOUR HOURS long. a colossal challenge, i must say. i mean, sitting for 3 and a half hours and im already giving an arm and a leg to go home, not to mention FOUR hours. what cheers me up is that ivan, huey eng, corrina and i are gonna study at the library after that! =) haha..something to look forward to. and not forgetting the all important fish and chips meal awaiting our arrival. okaaaaay..guess im gonna sleep now =) 'our father', mr chua is studying right now and hes hopeful that i will do the same =p haha..sorry dad!! the bed is all set, poised to take on an extra weight equivalent to mine =p so..tata =)

2005-08-31T21:53:00.000-07:00

YAYYYYY!!!!!! i can finally get into the new entry page. for years and years, i've made countless attempts at entering the damned page, but alas, to my horror! i am unable, and my attempts at blogging are rendered futile. anyways., haha..sorry, i've kinda been MIA for several light years, but im back, so be thankful =p

went back to ZHSS yesterday! and WHHOA the art gallery looks SO bloody nice!! it has nice doors with a nice cherrywood shade, with nice handles and of course, nice paintings and everything!! sadly though, that is the only aspect which has improved aesthetically. i mean, just LOOK at the ugly colours in which they have decided to paint the school! it looks like its been done by someone with no colour sense. haha. and OH MY GOD, the girls' toilets are VIOLET. violet loo. now, we ALL know where that came from =p in case u were wondering, the VP's name is violet loo too..haha..thats great! maybe she's happy she has a namesake now. as ex students, we should all be happy for her too and embrace Operation paint-the-toilets-to-remind-the-students-of-their-VP *cheers* we were discussing how in time to come, they would probably go a step further and hang her portrait in every cubicle and line the walls with her famous 'walk briskly and purposely' quote.

the chem labs are painted pink! heehee..in my biased opinion, thats kinda cool. =D hopefully, that will inspire the girls to do their chem pracs with more gusto and enthusiasm. i think mr won instructed the painters to paint it pink before he left. how can we not remember his trademark pink shirt? and red basket. haha..he seems inclined to the various shades of red.

mr yeo is piling on the pounds! haha..everyone noticed it, but he made us shout "mr yeo, ni shou le!" across the staffroom! haha..saw miss ow too!! my favourite english teacher =p except for when she gave me 0 for that stupid compre for telling cheryl who told emmalyn, the vocab words in advance. haha. she asked me how i was doing for gp, cuz its the only subejct shes concerned about, and i went, uhhhhhhhh uhhhhhhhhh..its okaaaaaay. acually, NO its NOT okay. my marks have been steadily decreasing since the first test. which is downright weird. the more she teaches us, the worse my marks get. haha.

and i should have given miss ow something!! =( the guilt is tearing my heart open and crushing it with its mighty fist. haha. i SO need to thank her for getting me through olevel english. besides, her lessons were ALWAYS so amusing and they really were worth looking forward to. i mean, considering the situation NOW, gp lessons arent altogether something to scream about. i dont exactly dread them either, cuz..english words are fun? haha..i find bio tuts an absolute dread though, but the reason is unfathomable.

we saw mr choo too, but unfortunately, he doesnt remember us. well then, guess i didnt have to tell him that i got a B3 for his subject (physics. blehh)..haha..i was shocked to know that mr won become a teacher with the autism school instead!! i mean, that is one big change. haha, i think patrick's hair looks way better now =p he has that slight fringe thingy. it adds a certain tinge of softness to the overall look. i know some of you might already be puking over this =D but im just being impartial and objective. there was that guy from 4T1 i think, who thought little of his generuos dollop of eyeliner. it was SO good charlotte! and like, every other rock band who has decided to follow the lead of good old good charlotte. but then again, u gotta admit, he does have guts.

tammy was there too, and by golly, she looked mature to the highest degree. haha..adeline said she had a presentation. i really envy mass comm students. sometimes i wonder if ive made a mistake not taking mass comm after all..you know..i used to want to be a like, a newscaster and stuff..haha..and there probably isnt a very chance of me becoming that anymore. and adeline looks way cool =D

i wish ear piercing werent so laden with risks, because i want one at the top of my ear (that would be FIVE on my left!!) but then, u hear all these stories about how people can go blind getting their ears pierced cuz the thing hit a nerve or whatever, and thats a pretty big deterrent. of course, there are success cases, but really, maybe those people just got lucky. perhaps i should just content myself with a 4-2 =p OR i could get my RIGHT ear pierced, there's still space below the risky portion.

okay, time for the second meal of the day. aw shucks i still have to do gp corrections for the essay. which suuuuuucks. may i get through this day in one piece, untainted and untarnished by the barrage of homework to complete.

2005-08-09T03:58:00.000-07:00

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY EVERYONE!! heheh.
yesterday was kinda funy, having that picnic thing and swaying (vigorously) to the music and dressing up the mascot!! jared was the mascot. haha. we made him wear a 'manhunt singapore' sash and stapled 'I LOVE SINGAPORE' on the sash on his behind. haha. joan sprayed on some lingerie for jared on his white shirt =p which was considered decent, if u know what angeline initially intended to spray..hahaha..it was really funny, she even sprayed a belly button! and she sprayed on a g string!! =p YES! bright red g-string, bryan! haha. and then we wanted to spray some for jessica, who finally gave in due to our fine persuasion skills and let us ruin her hair. BUT the red spray paint ran out, so like, there were only white straks in her hair!! so she looked sorta like a skunk. haha. well, so did everyone's, until the red was sprayed on! it makes ur hair really stiff! it felt like i was wearing a wig. i love temp hair sprays! perhaps i shall set up a stall selling em next time. haha. fioni looked old cuz of the uneven white straks! =p we did PW yesterday too, which i thought was pretty sianish until we started doing it. i really wanted to watch charlie and there was supposed to be a class outing..sighhhhhhhh..oh well. this is what u get for not completing your WR!!! i think in total, we spent 8 hours writing WR, on 2 days. we're not SLOW, we're PERFECTIONISTS =p haha. AMK library is a fun place to do pw. i ate fish and chips yesterday! i used to love fish and chips, and everytime i wrote in autograph books, i'd always put my favourite food as fish and chips. haha. somehow, over the years, it lost out to pizza and spaghetti, but yesterday, my lunch rekindled my love for fish and chips =p the baby carrots were sorta hard, but disgestible, i hope. fioni didnt like her carrots and was passing one little slab to me, when it dropped into her latte =p haha. and she dug it out with a fork, all foamy and unappetising!! heehee. steffi liked the carrots too! the fish was good. haha..reminds me of a certain teacher called..=p well, weiling said you could order it in a restaurant!! =D MMMMMMM my mom's cooking curry. i like curry. so i shall go eat some curry. haha. thank you justin the muffin for the hair spray!! =)

2005-08-04T03:38:00.000-07:00

oh my GOD!! i have another bruise! this time, on my arm. haha. im turning into a walking bruise myself. and guess WHO caused it!!!!!!!!!!! mary jane again!! haha. okay, so it was probably my fault for shooting the rubber at him during econs first, which subsequently made him want to snatch the band out of my tightly clenched fist, which THEN led to him refusing to let go of my arm, HENCE explaining the new bruise. you know, like, internal bleeding or whatever. some blood vessels broke or something, possibly due to the pressure on my poor arm. and FIONI too!! she um, whacked my leg during lunch =p hahaha what for, i forgot. see? TWO MORE concrete examples of how the class leaders are harbouring more violent tendencies these days.

we had to do this gp presentation today on the countries we researched on in groups and BOY did she look pissed!! like, probably cuz we were taking up the whole two periods just presenting. i think she looks kinda friendly, so sometimes she looks like she's hiding her annoyance (though apparent) behind her expression of extreme calm and amicability. but today it was blatant and clear as day, SO NOT unobtrusive and SO VERY obvious. i asked fiona and fong ee but they didnt seem to detect any of that irratation which i (and my gp group) felt was glaring. haha. maybe it was cuz we were actually facing her. =p oh my god dont tell her i said this.

i just did my bio tut just now and i totally felt like crying doing the damned thing!! bio stats is like a TOTAL energy sapper. and its so pointless! hours and hours of pressing the keys on the calculator, adding up the figures. yeah, thats REALLY gonna help me in later life. adding up my salary, finding the mean cost and standard deviance of milk powder. haha. uhhhh not like im gonna have a baby. as childish as it sounds, it looks painful. maybe i could adopt children like angelina jolie. i think its so cool how she adopted children from the orphanage. her family is so multiracial. haha..oh that reminds me, we're going to gracehaven salvation army for our service learning at the end of the year! mr ng said because there were so many girls in the class, we probably should not 'work'/play/whatever with the teenage boys category. but like, its quite weird if we go there and only talk to the little kiddies right? haha..besides, how harmless can they be in the presence of the entire class??? you can answer that question if you want.

oh bloody hell! there's gp essay to do! and its not even a topic i would remotely consider under exam conditions. to what extent can poverty be alleviated? DAMMIT. she wants us to hand it in on MONDAY, along with NEWSPAPER ANALYSIS, another unpleasant, headache stimulating task. i dont like essays! besides, i seem to be deproving!! my common test essay was worse than the test. *screams*

2005-08-02T07:55:00.000-07:00

i am SOOOO mad right now!!!! i lost my itty bitty concealer stick!!! if that isnt worse enough, tomorrow i will wake up to find a humongous red zit on the tip of my nose. oh please please please let the concealer pop up somewhere when im asleep, and let me find it in my bag tomorrow, even though i've practically turned it inside out and it's still not there. =( AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! this is a nightmare come true. i mean, not that im VAIN or anything, but who wants a bright red flashing lamp at the tip of your nose??? or on any part of the face, for that matter.

i've just typed out our business proposal =p its for the econ business enterprise thing, and we're selling chocolate bars and soft drinks which the schoool does not have. OH OH OH!! they have FINALLY started work on the air cons in the hall! thank goodness! i dont want to have to do my exams wading around in my own sweat at the end of the year. there was a bio test today and horror of horrors or joy of joys (depending on the marks i get), its not counted!!! we have been FOOLED, ladies and gentlemen! into believing that the test was counted!!! haha. well, it figures. didnt think they'd be so kind to leave out the all essential and headache-inducing ESSAY QUESTION.

the chinese teacher told my parents that i dont hand in my work on time!!! how could she!! when our business is up and running, we will practise first degree price discrimination and charge her 10 times higher than the cost price..hahah..i realised i havent been blogging for years!! my blog's grown a nice silvery beard and nice silvery white hair to match.

HEY!! the THREE class leaders are getting ever so violent!! FIRSTLY, jessica kicked my shin at the neoprint station!! well, perhaps i asked for it, by whacking her with the curtain. hahah..but it was a cloth!!! u cant compare the impact which cloth has on the skin to a shoe on the shin!! i've been bruised on my left leg. and TODAY!!! in the computer lab! jared/mary jane/mary was playing around and preventing me from getting to my chair, and in our struggle, the chair leg hit my RIGHT shin. THUS, i have been bruised on both legs. pretty sight, huh? =) ACTUALLY, the impact of the chair on my shin wasnt all THAT great, its just that for some obscure reason, my skin seems pretty thin and like, the slightest touch results in a bruise. oh, whats more, they're both class leaders!! and they both start with 'J'!! J for..juvenile delinquents!! im exclaiming a lot today, arent i? haha.

i donated blood you know!!! isn't that totally cool?! contrary to popular belief, i did NOT donate blood for the mere sake of getting a cool looking dressing thingy. i did it because i truly want to donate blood to the HSA. *big smile* the nurses were really nice! i told her she had really cool hair!! it was all spiky and stuff! she said she was having a bad hair day and it was not so cool =p and the other nurse told me to say bye to my bag of blood!!!! haha. it was so warrrrm against my skin! unbeknownst to me, i have been emitting internal heat. haha. and it didnt hurt a bit =)

oh SHITTTTT theres chem bloody pre bloody spa bloody practice tomorrow. and bio on thursday which is even worse. i so have to read my past practicals. GOODBYE!!

2005-07-23T09:33:00.000-07:00

my cheek is peeling! pretty soon, i will have zero cheek skin. what will be left is a prominent patch of bald, unprotected area of flesh on my face. its all the clearasil's fault! and its not like its a worthy price to pay! its not even removing my pimples! without removing the entire patch of skin along with it. haha. its so rough there now! like sandpaper. in fact, if i rub my finger against it long enough, it will probably generate enough friction to start a small fire. my head will be in flames =D

mom is nagging at me again. because of surprise surprise, my PROGRESS REPORT. mr ng is like a harbinger. you know, like a bearer of bad news. thats harbinger right? haha. he wanted to see us individually, to like, talk about our results with us. it really exhibited his caring-teacherness. she's like this nag machine with no stop button. every time she senses a bad grade, she goes to on mode and doesnt stop until the pigs fly home. i REALLY hate it and cannot stand it when she does that. she doesnt give me credit at all for the things i do well in! i've told her a zillion and one times before that time was not on my freaking side for chem, so i didnt manage to do all the mcqs, but its like talking to a brick wall. and she seems to understand other people better than her own daughter! like, when we met huilin that day and she asked, 'how was exam?' and huilin was like, quite difficult, she went all, 'oh, first term is like that.' wtf man!!! ill do a triple back flip if she ever said that to me. and when i do well, or better than before at least, suddenly she's so proud of me. like during olevels. *fumes* maybe she thinks im a dumbass or whatever. i just wish she wouldnt pass any sarcastic comments if she doesnt have anything nice to say. like, if u cant encourage me, the least u can do is not to discourage me. i should stick one of those '101 things to say to encourage your children' posters on her mirror. i saw it once at the doctor's, and i thought it was really cool =p think some genius kid must have come up with it. ooh my chinese teacher gave quite bad comments. haha. for promtness of handing in work, she gave me an average. haha..well, i must admit, she's right. its just, with her, chinese is becoming so dry and i now have zero interest in it. believe me, i used to like chinese. now its like, the only reason i feel that going to chinese is worthy is that we get to sit right under the air con and soak in all that water vapour. =D this is a BAD attitude to don. and anyway, i got below average for chinese. haha..sad case..

i feel like running away. but there's nowhere to run to. i mean, seriously, i could take my wallet and all the money i have and probably take a little walk around the neighbourhood, live on the streets at night, go to school in the morning and never come back so that they cant find me, but i need to bathe, and i cant take showers in public. i wish my room had a secret passageway. i wish she were more understanding. i wish they had this like, secret centre for troubled teens to take refuge and seek comfort and shelter in. maybe i should start one. haha.

2005-07-21T03:46:00.000-07:00

AHHHHH!

NOOOOOO!

this HAS to stop!

i cant go on like this anymore!

haha.

i know they tell us not to fabricate results for practicals, but really, considering the pace i go about doing my practicals, its a wonder i ever get to FINISH the experiement, let alone the questions. SO me and jessie have begun on our little faking spree, starting from yesterday =D yesterday was chem prac and we were supposed to do the thermochem experiment twice, and take 3 readings for the gravi analysis thingy. but we took 2 readings and did the thermochem once. i mean, honestly, its probably gonna be about the same anyway right? haha.

and today, i did the find-the-water-potential-of-the-radish-discs experiment once only. there was so no time at all. the radish cylinders, like the potato cylinders are absolutely the most adorable things on earth. they could possibly be cuter than babies. haha. nahhh. and during break, i found out that jessie did what i did! that is, faked the results for exp 2. hooray for jessie! =D now now, im not saying that what we're doing is necessarily acceptable, but desperate times call for desperate measures. there is ALWAYS a way out. =p

shake it, shake shake it, shake it. oh MAAAAAN i have a bio file to pack. if you want to continue reading new entries on this blog, lets all hope that my papers are where i think i've left them. i wonder if miss abraham is like, annoyed with us or anything. it does get pretty dead in class sometimes. wonder if she is irritated with the lack (or rather, absence) of overenthusiastic participation. haha. we were imagining her complaining about us in the staffroom, or wherever teachers go to complain about their students. =p

2005-07-18T08:07:00.000-07:00

WHOAAAA f.y.i, this blog is still active. its me thats been inactive this whole week. haha. there was listening compre today. it was kinda cool, much easier than the school's! the schoo's listening compre left you totally frustrated, i could only shade the answers when they played the passages the second time. but they SO should not have let us listen to 92.4 just minutes away from the exam! do they not realise how sleep-inducing harp music is?! i was practically falling asleep at my desk, or as jessie says, suffering a brain shutdown. she suffers a brain shutdown everyday! haha. it only resumes working mode during break or lunch. she must meet her shutdown conditions pretty easily. where blank space is proportionately > functioning brain cells.

we went to this humorous speech contest on saturday, sponsered by mrs tan! =p we couldnt very well refuse her kind invitation, could we? nope, not when she presented us with the admission tickets. the first few contestants were SO not funny. i mean, even watching a lump of gold rust would have been funnier. of course, it isnt easy trying to make ur audience laugh (see, balanced argument, eng wen.)

there was this guy who was hilarious, but in the wrong way =p like, he was animatedly illustrating how he was having chilli crabs for dinner or whatever meal (couldnt be breakfast, i suppose), and as he said 'chilli crab', he made this crab action of walking sideways with his arms acting as pincers! i totally burst out laughing in the way that people do when they see others being silly on stage. i mean, seriously, the crab action was probably uncalled for, in an attempt to inject humour into his humorous speech =p

one guy was funny, and for that, i give him credit. me and weiling referred to him as the roti prata man, cuz that was, i dare say, what stood out most in his entire speech, the part bou him being called roti prata. haha.. you know what else i noticed? that people are generally interested in the love lives of others =p simply put. like, the speaker can be assured a giggle or guffaw or two when he says 'back in my college days, i was very popular with the girls!' or how this woman had a crush on a gorgeous dude..heh..stuff like that get people amused =D just a leeeeetle observation i made. the food was good! haha..it reminded me of pre u sem, actually. like, during the parallel discussions and stuff, where ministers and People of High Authority would attend, the food would be finger licking scrumptious. and after that, standards would plummet. haha.

i forgot to hand in bio prac on friday!! ms yap DID mention she would give a zero to whoever handed in late. and yes, that would unfortunately be ME. thankfully, she understood that hey, people do forget, and so she let me off after a warning of 'next time, ill take action.' haha. phewwww. or maybe i looked pitiful, like maybe my ears were drooping.

we interviewed the canteen vendors for our PW today. the response was, to our UTMOST relief and joy, very positive! oh yeah, jared did a cut and paste zhou ji! haha. he cut mine and pasted it to his. then everyone tried to draw stupid stuff like hearts (me) and lips (also me) and other girly stuff on his paper to hand in to lao shi. haha. fioni wrote 'lao shi, wo ai ni!' and i wrote 'muack' beside it. we thought she'd probably be flattered that she should have an admirer among us =p he really did hand it in to her! but sadly, she didnt think it was funny, and told him to redo it. haha..sigh, whatever happened to her sense of humour?

i ate like, a muesli bar which was jam packed with carbohydrates and half a stick of roulette sweets, on top of lunch today. =( i feel utter regret. i mean, all that is probably going to accumulate to form a new layer of fat over the existing one. i shall probably have to roll and bounce to school tomorrow. =(

see ya. =)

2005-07-11T07:46:00.000-07:00

im back!!

come on, who's glad to see me? lemme see your hands in the air! then wave them like you care! woooooo! fioni, your insanity is infusing into me. we were supposed to interview mr wee today, so we told ms A during PW that we were going to the toilet, al four of us, kinda like a all for one, one for all thing, so that we could go find mr wee and book an appointment with him before he escaped from school grounds. she asked why we had to go to the toilet together..=p what a question! clearly she hasnt heard of safety in numbers. haha. i mean, really, can YOU predict what might happen to one of us, unguarded, alone, in the corridors? i wonder if she suspected anything fishy. i half expected her to peek out the classroom window and catch us running to the staffroom and then she'd shout "the toilet's over THERE, you fools!" haha. but when we came back after a futile hunt for Wee, she was still at group durian's table =p we even walked past every classroom in block 11 to try our luck at spotting him. it was fun! like those adventures the famous five goes on. or secret seven? or whatever. an escapade! and a fruitless one, at that.

oh woww, the girls and guys teams got champs in north zone or something, for air rifle and the girls clinched all 1st 3 places! heehee. i heard they practised everyday during the june holis! like, whoaaaa. if i did that, my grades would suffer tremendously. i didnt fail math. yippee =D haha..she remembers! sweet =p haha..weiling, i hope you are reading this. remember every contour, and every pustule. DID YOU KNOW? pustule is another word for pimple. haha. it sounds gross, doesnt it? brings to mind a pus-filled zit, ripe, poised and ready to burst. ewwww. i bought a concealer stick yesterday, of which its invention is something i am very thankful for. it conceals my hideous zits, for one. i have 2 zits now =( they're not at bursting point yet. they're still pupating, red and they hurt! like, if you touch them. BUT! apply a tinge of concealer and voila! blemish-almost-free face.

oh i think i forgot to mention that on the way to the staffroom to find mr wee, F was singing the weewee song. haha. and today, me and joan were in a national-day mood! we sang, with the pride and honour that comes with being a singaporean (...), songs which required a great deal of patriotism and lack of embarrassment. that is, the embarrassment that arises from having people look at you singing national day songs a month in advance. sometimes i think he can be really curt and rude. whether or not unwittingly, im not sure.

thankssss eng wen, for that detailed and im sure, very effective, description of how to cure headaches. =D i had oral on thursday! it was..fun, to say the most. the question wasnt like what the school gave me, thankfully. AND i dunno why, but strangers, such as those in the form of oral examiners from other schools, make me smile even more. like, i was getting up from the prepare-your-passage seat and walking over to the examining table and this huge grin was just plastered onto my face. like i was happy to see them! so i walked over, grinning from ear to ear like a mad idiot. they smiled back, though, but maybe they were just being patronising. haha..my accent was so horrible! whatever happened?! can my chinese deteriorate to such an alarming extent in a matter of months??!! i mean, i spoke like one of those english-speaking pp! i mean, okaaaaaay so i do speak mostly english and all that, but i could do it last year! i just lost the ability for it =( i think..i think they were laughing at my predicament! sinister fiends! i didnt know how to say some words in chinese, like 'single child'. i said DAN shen nu. which is stupid, cuz it sounds like dan shen ma ma. which is like, single mom, right? and i am SO not a single mom. haha..WELL i hope they had a good laugh while examining me. it's always good to destress. oh, apaprently, im a high I =p so i destress by interacting with people. haha.. the night has lost its youth, in the process of me writing this lengthy (somewhat) blogtry. blogen? enblog? tryblog? or whatevre's the short form for 'blog entry'. SO i better go sleep =)

2005-07-10T04:59:00.000-07:00

haha..im now entertaining a request for me to blog more often. courtesy of..*drumroll* IVAN! =D heh. ive gotten lazier recently (is that even vaguely possible?) so ive lost the passion and urge and motivation and impetus and drive to blog as often as daily. WELL, got my results back..they look bleak, i must say, but im quiiiiiiite okay with them. =p low standards and expectations, perhaps? haha..or rather, knowledge of my abilities. oh dear i need to go now! but i promise ill be back soon. u havent seen the last of me! hafta go take the third square meal of the day now =p

2005-07-04T00:00:00.001-07:00

oh woooo got back from bangkok yesterday. bought lotsa stuff =) they were all so much cheaper compared to singapore stuff, now that im back, i think everything is expensive. haha. i took a photo of the roadside hawker!! cuz like, how often do u see real hawkers hawking their hawkery ware on the streets of singapore? apart from roasted chestnuts. heh. i didnt really like roasted chestnutsies at first, but now that im well, more acquainted with their burnt taste, i think they're passable =p just your average nut.

of course, i didnt go right up to the guy, stick the camera in his face and snap away. it would have been infringing on his privacy. haha. i sneakily took a shot of him from inside the van thing on the way to the airport. the girls are pretty and the guys are dishy! so not fair =p like, every turn you make, there's a pretty girl/good looking dude round the corner. its as if everyone works in a modelling agency. there's so much beauty around them. haha.

the computer's all cranky, its so laggy and the words are appearing so slowly, but im a lazy bum, cant be bothered to restart the thing..haha. well, the exams were sucky, i must say. if i even pass math, i swear i'd jump over the moon and circle the universe a thousand times. i have a sinking feeling im gonna fail. im SO gonna be kicked out of alpha thingy. there was this impromptu workshop thingy today, at 9am, when all was still dark and favourable for sleeping in. but NOOOOO i had to spring out of bed at the wail of my alarm and dash to get ready. actually, my alarm is one of those clock radio thingies. the workshop was fun, except when i had to speak on this dumb topic. i sucked, anyway. =p impromptu speech is NOT my forte. the guy talked about pronunciation and all that. like what miss ow used to do with us. you know, the same stuff about udders and others and all. in sec 3, miss ow once made us say 'the other brother' one by one. REMEMBER, ALCOTT PEOPLE? and ever since then, ive become conscious of my 'th' sounds =D

i have this splitting headache now caused by i dont know what. i got home, bathed and SUDDENLY, i get this headache. a splitting one too. in fact, my head's already partially ruptured. its being held together by a single vein. THATS how bad my headache is. until last year, i never knew what a headache felt like! never really had one before. until now. but no worries, not when i ve got my handy dandy..axe brand medicated oil! heehee i used to love watching blue's clues, even until um, primary 6. *hides her face in embarrassment* i used to wonder what the guy really was like in real life. i mean, he couldnt go prancing around acting all kiddish with his adult friends right? i also used to marvel at the courage the high five guys had. like, to sing all those kiddy songs and dance those kiddy moves, it must take more than money to get em to do it. haha.

oh yeah, i kinda had fun writing my chinese compo! haha. weirdo, freak, whatever =p i havent written a narrative for such a long time, i miss doing em. of course, i'd rather be doing the entire thing in english, but hey, u cant have everything. i didnt read the first two topics, the expo-ish kind which i feel is boring and sianish. narratives give you the opportunity to describe scenes, people's expressions, thought, actions in vivid detaiL! i really wish gp had narratives again. like, what about budding young authors?! should we really quell all that writing talent and creativity just to develop expository writing ability?!!!! SHOULD WE?!!! god i hate retorical questions.

i just read bobby's and liying's blogs and i really feel the same way as they do bout the class. simply put, it has NO CLASS SPIRIT. we will never have the kind of on-ism and cohesion similar to that of 1805. its SO segregated right now, its like a school with different classes in it instead of a whole class. i dunno whether its cuz the majority are girls are there are many cliques or what. but thats not really true! i mean, pp from girls' schools bond just fine. is it because the second intakers feel like they share more in common with each other than us? or do they feel that we're not receptive and approachable enough..its just so natural for the class to be distinctly divided into first and second intakers. no offence to the second intake pp in my class who read my blog. honestly, i dont think there are any! except for liying, but like, liying's very sociable, she goes with everybody, and thats cool :)

i guess when 25 people are thrown into a class together and they all come from different schools (mostly), its easier for them to bond, cuz its like, everyone's on level ground and no cliques have been formed yet, so its like a do or die thing. make friends or be forced to live your school days in solitude. and everyone just..clicked with everyone else! i must admit, we had more chemistry back then than now. so far i only know of bobby and liying who feel like this, from their blogs, but i hope that we wont dwell too much on the differences and segregation within the class. i do hope class spirit is something that can be fostered with time. the situation may not be to our liking right now, but we can adapt, change, and make an effort to MAKE it right.

i have to do my chinese book review now. which SUCKS!! but the chinese teacher already has a black mark on me..its not wise to accumulate too many black marks too fast, you know. because of this, in order to protect myself from other black marks, i think ill do it later today =( procratination is NOT wrong.

2005-06-24T03:54:00.000-07:00

this is funny. a minute ago, my fingers would have flown across the keyboard, but now that i've come to the 'new entry' page, i feel at a lost for words. there's so much to say but it's all so hard to put into words. know what i mean. everyone thinks i've 'moved on'. but i dont think i have, completely. not a hundred percent. who am i kidding? not even 90 percent. a little known fact. not too long ago, i was thinking a lot about him, and us and like, what we used to do together, what he used to say, how we used to have fun..and how my hand used to fit into his..i dont know why, and i wish these things dont hit me suddenly like they do. i dont even know if ure reading this..but i guess it doesnt matter. the other night i was talking to him online and i just really felt, at that moment, that i missed him. i nearly told him. but thanks to the circumstances, refrained from committing such a folly. incidentally i just read your blog. incidentally i feel SAD when i think about us. incidentally, i didnt think you knew that. incidentally i feel a right twerp for saying all this. because really, what would it change? Nothing. note the capital N. its just that its pre-dinnertime now, i had time to go online and blog and after reading ur blog, i got SAD again. thats right. is that ALL im good for? was i put on this earth for the sole purpose of getting sad? incidentally, i was wondering how many more incidentallys im going to include. reminds me of miss chan. back to the issue. what told me so..who the hell said he was better than you. and who the hell said anything was going to develop. frankly i have no idea why im even writing this shit. okay, so its not shit. i only feel its shit because i feel shitty. so virtually everything around me is shit. i am surrounded by dung. immersed in manure. oh thats gross, im grossing myself out.

2005-06-23T08:37:00.000-07:00

oh WOW. i found this little piece of foolscap, on which was scribbled, with preposterously ugly handwriting, my innermost thoughts, feelings and opinions of the kind of situations i was in at that time. i had a good laugh reading them all over again. of course, at the point when these emotions were pouring out of my little heart, i didnt think it was funny at all. apparently, i was confused (how cliched is that?!) over him1. actually, i was confused bout him2 as well. as for him3, i was beginning to hate him. hated his guts, hated his..everything. but im not now. its clear as day. there's really nothing which can bring about the amount of confusion equivalent to that 3 months ago. cuz according to what i wrote, him1 was starting to be nice to me again. civil, at least. none of that coldness. oh CRAP!! what am i writing?! i dont even feel like writing today!! haha justin can be so cute sometimes!! =p we were being all silly and stupid (me, anyway) last night. online, i mean. and he was the clank-a-lot tin man. heehee. he's fun.

2005-06-20T08:58:00.000-07:00

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Seems like just yesterday
You were a part of me
I used to stand so tall
I used to be so strong
Your arms around me tight
Everything felt so right
Unbreakable like nothing could go wrong
Now I can't breathe
No I can't sleep
I'm barely hanging on

Here I am
Once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it
Can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

I told you everything
Opened up and let you in
You made me feel alright
For once in my life
Now all that's left of me
Is what I pretend to be
So together but so broken up inside
cause I can't breathe
No I can't sleep
I'm barely hanging on

Here I am
Once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it
Can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

Swallow me then spit me out
For hating you I blame myself
Seeing you it kills me now
No I don't cry on the outside
ANYMORE!.....Anymore

Here I am
Once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it
Can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

Here I am
Once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it
Can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

2005-06-18T09:50:00.000-07:00

OH, the horror.

OH, the disappointment.

OH, the despair.

my mom thinks im some kinda weakling or something. she wont let me carry the groceries. she always says 'no, very heavy.' oh YEAH, like she's queen of the Amazons. like, okaaay so i dont get gold with honours for my freaking NAPFA or even a goddamned A for bloody IPU, but i highly doubt that i will be pinned under a tiny, hardly significant bag of groceries while attempting to lift it. you dont need bulging biceps and washboard abs to carry GROCERIES, for gods sake. oh, speaking of washboard abs, that reminds me! there's manhunt on wednesday i think. haha. im so gonna watch it =p hmmmmm.............................................
went out with him again yesterday. =) it was cool. due to my limited vocabulary, i dont wish to elaborate. heh. but it was RAINING. no, i did not share an umbrella with him, like what u see in the movies.it kinda stopped when i got there. heh. like, hellllllo? could the clouds have chosen a more inappropriate time to release their contents? i hate carrying an umbrella, but i couldnt very well have trudged unsheltered in the pouring rain, could i? well, i COULD. then i could tell him its cuz i swam there through the sewer. im always late! WHY am i always late? maybe it runs in the family, so i cant be blamed =D but NO. my mom's punctual. she's SUPER punctual. oh whatever. FASHIONABLY late has a nicer ring to it.

2005-06-15T03:14:00.000-07:00

ow ow ow and double ow with a capital O, underlined and in bold.

yesterday, i woke up and my right ankle was swollen! in short, i

1. cant walk perfectly upright like a normal person

2. thus have to resort to limping/hobbling/crawling to make my way around

3. take about only a few thousand centuries to get from point A to B. regardless of the distance between A and B.

4. have an unproportionately larger right ankle. its so swollen it looks like an
elephant's foot. =( wellllll, i could be exaggerating.

5. may not be able to walk again!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! =( i hope not. oh my GOD, maybe the swollen ankle is a ..sign! to warn me of oncoming disasters! or MAYBE its a punishment!! for something terrible i did in my past life. i had a dream last night. i dreamt i saw calvin goh!! my primary 6 classmate, whom i have not had ANY contact with for the past 5 years. could it be a premonition??

6. may not be able to go out for the next two days =( i wanted to wear a skirt on friday, but seeing as my elephant foot will probably scare the daylights out of everyone, i may have to wear jeans. AGAIN. to conceal my hideous swollen ankle. why does something always have to crop up when im going out with him? hmmmm. point to ponder.

i just took a teeny peek down at my ankle and discovered that it has swollen a bit more. =( and oh my god, its bloody red. haha. bloody red. red like blood. whatever. not in the mood for puns. i think the veins/arteries there are super super dilated. perhaps my ankle is heating up and there is a pressing need to remove heat by radiation, lest it overheats and explodes, leaving me with a busted leg. haha. come to think of it..that may not necessarily be a crazy, absurd, ludicrous thought.

in case anyone was wondering, i still sound like a man. although not so manly. like, a girly man. haha. every morning, i wake up with a slight sliver of hope. hope that my voice will finally be restored to normality! and every morning (actually, only yesterday and today), i practise singing a scale! and if i cant even hit the fourth note, i know that its not ready yet, and so retreat back to my humdrum existence. =( weird but effective way of finding out whether ure still sore-throated. highly recommended!

is this some kind of sick joke?! first, i fall ill on the day im supposed to go out with him, THEN when i recover, i go to camp and get my throat busted, and NOW, to make things a zillion times worse, my ankle conveniently decides to bloat itself. (and blush too! its glowing crimson.) haha.

2005-06-14T01:00:00.000-07:00

HAHA! i just went to check out bobby's blog, cuz well, ive never checked it out before. he signs off as 'bobby'. so funny! like, we've all become so used to calling him bobby =p hardly anyone calls him reuben anymore. well, if they did, im not one of them. haha. ooh winnie came online, and left as suddenly as he came. probably to answer the call of the honey bees. haha.

i SO do not have the slightest ounce of discipline in my body. i was reading my inequalities notes halfway and then suddenly BAM! an idea hits me. a loud, persuasive voice yells 'go paint your nails, you fool! you KNOW you want to!' and surprise surprise, i did. determinaton is not one of my strong points. haha..i thought they were getting kinda plain-looking you know, all nail and no colour. they had no LIFE!! SO it was up to ME, saviour of the nails, to inject colour, vigour and life into them! i painted em transparent silver. partly cuz its my only bottle of nail polish left besides the topcoat one, which is turning yellow, kinda like how plastic watches turn yellow when they're all naked and exposed to the harmful sun.

i am in loner mode today. i dont feel like msging anyone. which, i must say, is a first, cuz usually im a sucker for company. haha. one of the banes of being an only child. *shrugs* no biggie, comes with the job. haha. NOOOOO. at this juncture, i feel i must defend fellow single children. its not BORING all the time. you get used to it! right, weiling right? haha. ooooh. a dull ache has just crept into my tummy and chest! =( its hurrrrrrrting me. its like last night! i had to curl into a ball.

did i also mention that for some unfathomable reason, my spontaneity/impulse (DAMMIT, i dunno how to spell) levels today are exceptionally high. its all like, i wanna do that! okay, ill do that! yeah. DAMMIT will SOMEONE, ANYONE ,teach me to put pictures in my blog?! ill pay you a handsome sum if you do! haha. what a load of crap. i am the brokest of the broke.

TIME'S UP! gotta take my cough syrup! mmmmmm..deeeeelicious. *smacks lips*

2005-06-13T03:12:00.000-07:00

=(

my voice is hoarse, husky, rough and low. in short, i sound like a MAN. and a sexy one at that! haha. but really, i still cant speak normally. hafta speak an octave lower and it SUCKS! celine called last night, but seeing as u can hardly make out what im trying frantically to express, i told mom to tell her to msg me. turns out she wanted to meet me so that she could photocopy the math notes. it was SUCH a bother!!!! shhhhhh, dont tell her. i mean, im not saying SHE'S the bother. i mean, the act of walking from home to the interchange to meet her is a tedious one. and she could hardly hear me on the phone! i was practically yelling my head off into the receiver and STILL all i got was a blur 'huh?' haha. that was REALLY piss-offing. i think her environment was too noisy. as i was saying, i went to the doctor today, and GUESS WHAT!! i have a THROAT INFECTION! whoa-hhohhhh. i've never had a throat infection before! apparently, some of my lymph nodes have swollen (to what extent??!!) and according to the doctor, my neck is sorta swollen too. !!! oh my god, really?? all afternoon, ive been feeling my neck and putting my fingers around it to measure its circumference. this sucks. i havent been comfortably audible for FOUR days. today marks the fifth. i hope nobody calls me while im in this state. celine made a huge mistake. she couldnt hear me, and i couldnt speak loud enough to be heard! heh. oh yeah! i now have TWO didis =D sebastian is my new didi. haha. oh but what the heck, i bet he has a zillion other jies. like avril! =p i just agreed cuz there's no harm in agreeing. anyway, i only really consider terence as my real didi =) see, loyalty at work. haha. incidentally, terence, doesnt like him. haha..dont tell him, avril..oh yeah, he asked me if i knew avril and xuemin =D isyraf, from pre u sem, calls me kiddo! =p so funny. i call him waiter, cuz he really looked like one in his MJC blazer! plus, his spiky(to a certain extent) hair.

2005-06-11T19:57:00.000-07:00

WOW. just got back from the Zhonghua camp yesterday and i was whacked out for ELEVEN hours! slept at 2, woke at 1am, when all was dark and not a soul was in sight. haha. actually, i owe my disturbed sleep to mom, who woke me up for medicine. i have NO voice now. i was shouting the whole of the first day! like, leading my otherwise un-enthu group in cheers and everything. my group was 2N2 yellow! i was kinda skeptical bout taking 2N2 at first, cuz i presumed they would be more rebellious than the rest. it wasnt a misconception, but really, they could be darlings sometimes. =) they gave me seaweed, chewing gum and mentos.

the girls were especially nice. or maybe it was cuz i was nice to them (=p) so they couldnt find it in themselves to disrespect me. haha. the guys were okay too, but i was particularly PISSED during the blindfold game, cuz some guys didnt want to play and all, and it was a waste of time trying to get them to participate. wonder if i looked angry. oh well. i WAS. but i get over stuff.

ryan has this like, split personality. haha. sometimes, he's a really big help getting the group together, especially when i couldnt shout anymore. yet, he refuses to take part in the games sometimes, giving stupid excuses like how he's allergic to the freaking sun. PLUS he hurls vulgarities at the slightest things. i guess that goes for the rest of them. he's a good monitor, though. =)

my sec 3 facilitator partner, zainul, SO did not shout. his voice was perfectly fine throughout the entire camp. SO not helpful. and i shan't even MENTION the other sec 3 NCC facilitator. they were supposed to help me! but it felt as if i was doing everything on my own. but i didnt mind. =p although credit must be given to zainul, cuz i made him carry the game score card and cheer lyrics and other paper stuff. i dont like extra luggage =p

sebastian was fun and helpful. apparently, he's not exactly the model student. he told me mr eswaran once made him do 200 pushups and lotsa other physically demanding punishment stuff at one shot. i forgot what he did. and yesterday during breakfast, my pang asked to see dingyao. he came over to my table, asked who dingyao was, grabbed him by the collar, pushed him to the bench we were sitting on and snapped "why did you push ___!!!!!!!!" i forgot the victim's name. haha. then mr pang made him run to the G.O. in 5 seconds.

whats amusing was the number of people who came to our table asking what happened, after that. it was like a queue-up-to-get-the-juicy-details session. i got a very clear view of the incident, cuz i was sitting right beside him, and mr pang is not soft spoken. i remember dingyao splitting his chopsticks apart and was juuuust about to eat his noodles when he got well, collar-grabbed. WHOA. and ryan was like, 'bu yao kan, bu yao kan. mei you dong xi.' and told everyone to go back eating. haha. i think the whole table was in shock.

as i got to know, dingyao kicked a guy till his leg had to be bandaged. or maybe he kicked a guy when his leg was already in a bandage. i didnt get the facts right. haha. its kinda hard to think that these people could get up to such mischief, cuz the sides they displayed when i was with them definitely did not tally with the kind of behaviour they exhibited on other days. dingyao was helpful too. he helped open the drain flaps in the girls toilet, during area cleaning =p the other guys only decided to offer their services when miss loo walked by.

oh, one thing i found out during the camp is that sinyee and jia ling can be very fierce when they want to =p sebastian and grace told me, on different occasions, that 2N2 had no class spirit. damned right they dont. hahaha. my group, for instance. they only cheered when i told them to, or when i started a cheer. they needed to be led to do stuff. then again, they're only sec 2s. i didnt know sebastian was retained until he said so!

i dont really regret taking 2N2, cuz i got the inside stories of all the naughty stuff they did. haha. they snuck outta school twice, on both nights, and apparently, they had a 'feast' last night. they bought ice cream, sprite, spaghetti and lotsa stuff to bring to their bunk. they claimed they wanted to ask me along, but they couldnt find me. i was in the canteen! but anyway, at 430 i was asleep after playing bridge with huishan, pat and vinnie. haha. ooh, gotta go now. later, babes and dudes.

2005-06-08T03:26:00.000-07:00

oh MAN. im just a sick, under the weather, diseased, unwell, poorly, ailing girl. i feel rotten, on the whole. like, my whole body is in severe, excruciating, unbearable and torturous pain. in my opinion, annyway. my neck aches, my shoulders ache, my arms ache. im like a walking, living specimen of the epitome of agony. dunno if ive got a fever..i lost my thermometer! although i doubt i would ever use it again. its been to places i wish i had never put it. i found it lying uncapped in my pencilcase once. imagine all that ink and lead and.. ughhhh. no amount of washing will ever cleanse it of all the slime, grime and filth its been swimming in. i mean, not that my pencilcase is filled with yucky stuff like that.

went out with josh yesterday =) i nearly msged him in the morning to cancel, cuz i doubted i was able to lug myself out of bed. but then after half an hours of sleep, i felt refreshed and ready to take on the day! thankfully. haha. i was kinda fine in the morning, but then the evening and especially the night, sucked. the train ride was virtually unendurable and insufferable. i had to stand all the way, cuz there werent any seats. i swear, i could vaguely hear a bone in my leg snapping. indicating what little time i had left on earth.

i hardly had dinner. well, i did, if you consider 5 mouthfuls of gravy beehoon a scrumptious and filling meal. the act of lifting my arm and instructing my hand to pick the spoon, to load it with beehoon and then transporting all its contents into my mouth, was just too strenuous a task. i think i slept at..830. my face feels warm now. im having a phlegmy cough, which is SO the worst thing in the world to have, considering there's the ZHSS sec 2 camp tml, for which we have to be present at 6 bloody 15 am. that's crazily early.

i hope im better tml! liek, fully recovered. now my chest hurts too. i wonder if its cuz of the expired sweet i ate yesterday. yes, unbeknownst to me, i have, the night before, consumed a strepsil which had been expired for about 10 months. i dont know whats going to become of me, sadly. i cant even tell if ive got food poisoning or whatever. theres camp tomorrow!!! i MUST study chem tonight. an added responsibilty. what could be more perfect?

2005-06-05T08:12:00.000-07:00

Almost heaven
Nanyang crescent
up on the hill
gathered at NTU
new engagements
and opportunities!
younger than the mountains
blowing like a breeze!

country roaaaaad
take me home
to the plaaaace
where i beloooooong
pre u sem, mountain mama
take me hoooome, country roaaaad

all my memories gather around here
PRE U SEMINAR, ideas come together
bright and sunny, painted in the sky
misty taste of moonshine
teardrop in my eye

*****

tonight we remember
the times that we spent here
the joy and the laughter that we shared
tonight we cherish
the moments spent together
because its the only time we have

look at us
and see our smiles
this is where
we all belong
ill remember the times we shared together
until, my last december

*****

oh my goodness. im suffering from pre u sem withdrawal syndrom. gruop 14, to be precise. i started singing country road in the bathroom while bathing! i can still remember how everyone was reluctant to sing at first, cuz we all thought it was a stupid thing to do. but then, gradually, everyone kinda got hooked on it, and we were singing everywhere we went =) i remember shouvik's grossly out of tune Countrty Road. i love the jumping part! in FACT, i sang the first verse, recorded it and sent it to fiona =p haha. she asked me why i didnt ding the chorus. sorry, dear, i didnt want to risk faltering at the high note part. haha. oh GOD. i miss having meals with them, doing mass dance with them, and not to mention the late night meetings after showering. i am immersed in nostalgia! i miss singing country road, and doing all those seemingly silly yet endorphin-releasing cheers. i love cheering. haha. when i first came online, i was bombarded by all my new contacts =p see, everyone wants me in their contact list! *laughs triumphantly* i miss the camp. =(

2005-06-03T07:26:00.000-07:00

oh my GOD. pre u seminar camp is the most AWESOME, ENJOYABLE, INSIGHTFUL, EMOTIONAL and VALUABLE experience i have ever had. i am so proud to be a part of it. when i first saw the name list, i was wondering if they were all gonna be arrogant, stuck up, bitchy people. but im SO glad they aren't. it was with fear that i first opened my room door with trembling fingers, wary and uncertain of what the (near) future held. i mean, i REALLY wanted my roommate to be a nice, friendly girl. not intimidatingly cold and distant. i guess wishes do come true =) angel is the best roomie on the planet. she's from SR and she is like a model roommate. haha. she's friendly and silly and SO not stuck up. we clicked great from the very beginning =D which i suppose we SHOULD, considering we would be sleeping in the same room =p dont want to get drugged or chloroform-ed in my sleep. haha.

gosh, so many amazing things have happened, i just dont know where to start! EVERY SINGLE DAY ROCKED!!! well, i thought wednesday sucked, cuz there were 2 panel discussions and 3 parallel presentations, and all that had to take place with blazers on. anyway, we sorta slept late on tuesday because somebody had this bright idea to have a ghost story telling session. i have to admit that i do NOT have the guts for such activities. so like, me and eunice bunked together in her and jana's room on the same SMALL bed and for that, i had to leave angel in our room alone. she claimed she would be fine. she's so not scared! she didnt even cry on the last night! when buckets were being filled with tears.

on the third night, we called in to carrie chong!!! charles called, and he passed the phone to kaiqi. haha. so shy =p (yeah right!) and kaiqi said apple was hot and sexy on air!! apple is kinda like the emcee guy. he's really good! gets the group all enthusiastic and high. we had to make a kite to fly on thursday, and thanks to amanda, our kite got second prize!! it was the prettiest kite!! and in MY opinion, nicer than the first prize one =p haha, but thats a biased view. from a very unreliable source. it was jonny's group. i really liked flying kite! although i needed help getting the thing in the air in the first place. i like feeling the tension in the string, the tug of the kite empowered by the wind. what was frustrating was how the thing kept getting entangled with other kites! and there was once where our SUPERIOR kite twined round 3 little kites! so like, we were indirectly the cause of the 'conflict' with the kite owners. haha. well, what can i say? our phoenix kite was merely exhibiting its superiority and majesty, asserting its well deserved power!! =D go phoenix!

i got sunburnt while flying kites! as usual. went back looking like an exceedingly embarrassed cooked lobster. amanda said i was positively roasting. haha. which brings me to my next point =p the people there talk superbly well. i mean, they all spoke so fluently and their english rocked and stuff. i hope, through our interaction during the last 5 days, that my english has improved? haha.

last night was very depressing and nostalgic. for the last part. come to think of it, it was kinda weird! initially, they got everyone all hyped up and high and cheering, and there was mass dance and all, but then, the solemnity of the ending part of Seminar Night really overshadowed everything else that happened earlier. it was REALLY touching what some of the SLOs went through just to make the camp a success..apple cried on stage..can u imagine? we sat in a circle with this ball of rafia string. someone would start we were supposed to throw the ball to someone we wanted to thank or 'seek forgiveness' from, as chitra put it. haha. so in the end, everyone would be interconnected with that same ball of string, which projected an accurate portrayal of how closely we had bonded over the short period of 5 days.

i really liked the part where apple asked, 'how many groups are there in this hall?' and everyone shouted 'ONE!' we were divided into 27 groups, but ultimately, we all belonged to one pre u sem group. =) and its comforting to know that everyone realised that. it was true, how everyone put aside their differences and got together to be the best camp cohort i have witnessed thus far. our spirit and enthusiasm were the main ingredients for the fun that we had.

last night was like this mass crying session. even raf cried..shedding his mr cool image for a split second. =) raf looks like a waiter! all smart and prep school. haha. he started calling me Kiddo today =) so cute. he said i looked like a kid. or something. then after we'd all dried our tears and held the remaining ones back, we met up after showering =D joshua gave this lesson on bridge playing =p it was like bridge tuition. i never understood how to bid before =p sorry, winnie, im not implying that ure a bad teacher. haha. it was cool, i think i was on a lucky streak!! me and my partner kept winning! woohoo =D but THEN josh wanted to go at 3!! hmmph. so like, we all retired. he was so funny. angel asked him if he had bathed, and he was like, oh shit i havent!! and i THINK he would have gone to bathe a second time if he hadnt remembered that he already did! haha. hes nice, but i only got to really know him like, yesterday and today. he's funny, in a cute way. =p

today before leaving we all did the last group 14 cheers. man, we totally rocked. its a nice feeling, this unity which held everyone together. like the rafia string. =) and everyone went around hugging everyone else in the group. gender differences were not of importance, as we are mature youths. haha. really, i mean, if u asked us to hug one another in like, sec 2, i think it would have been awkward. but i guess we've realised that its actually SO not a big deal anymore. i didnt really like to hug people, but today was exceptional. hugged everyone, except for pp who already went off!! =p

i thoroughly enjoyed the camp, not to mention all that insighful minister talk. met tharman today. we wanted to do like this tharman cheer! haha. the THARMAAAN..THARMAN (clap clap) THARMAAAAAN..THARMAN (clap clap) haha. but it would have been inappropriate. =p i, for one, enjoyed the pre u sem camp. i am SO glad i didnt quit it last time. i would never have got the chance to make such lovely new friends and to interact with so many people from ALL THE JCS IN SINGAPORE!! ALL HAIL PRE U SEM!!! WOO!! i love you, group 14. ure the best group in the world. =)